Our Selection

Chapter 16

I wake up screaming for my mother and I sit bolt upright in bed... A cold sweat covers me and I am shaking. Tears drip down my face and my heart feels like it has been ripped out, I tried to not think of her, it only made me upset. After she died, I didn't sleep for weeks, everytime I closed my eyes, I saw the same image. Her dying. The Rebel with a gun to her head, him pulling the trigger, the blood splattering my face, her blood splattering my face. I couldn't take it anymore so I blocked all memories or thoughts I had of her, until my childhood was nothing but memories of the family I had left. My breaths are uneven and shallow so I crawl out of bed and fumble to unlock the balcony door. It is impossible to see through the tears so I give up and slide down the wall and put my head in my hands, the tears come quicker and heavier now, I haven't cried in ages. I didn't cry when I left Alex or my Dad, I haven't cried since Mom died come to think of it, now all those feelings and emotions that I have stuffed inside of me, and kept hidden from the world are spilling out... Anyone could see them. I ball my hands into fist and start to punch the floor, trying to release my anger but it fails. Nothing I do can make me feel better about this... I pull my knees up to my chest and hide my face in my hands, trying to shut out the world. That's when I hear the door open. I freeze and I hear someone run over to me, before they even reach me I know who it is. Cameron.
"Wolf... What's wrong? It's okay, I'm here" He says softly trying to calm me and he sits beside me rubbing my back, I don't reply and I try to contain the sobs that threaten to spill out my mouth.
"Why are you here?" I whisper shakily and breathe in deeply, trying to stop myself crying and it seems to work
"I heard you... You were shouting for your Mom, I didn't want you to be alone, so I came down here to see you" He says quietly and I shake my head "Go back upstairs, I'm fine now, it's probably really late. What's the time?" I say trying to convince him
"It's 3 in the morning Wolf... I'm not leaving you, until I know your alright" He says softly but defiantly and I sigh. There is no point arguing with him, we both know he will win. All of a sudden a wave of tiredness hits me and I just want to go back to sleep, I rest my head on his shoulder, too tired to care if he doesn't want it there. He laughs softly and picks me up carefully before walking me over to my bed and lying me down on it. He pulls the sheets up, and covers me to make sure I don't get cold and a thought crosses my mind "You are going to make a great husband to one of those girls, they are going to be lucky to have you" I say sleepily and I'm so tired I barely realise what I am saying. He smiles at me softly and rubs my cheek with his thumb,
"Go to sleep Wolf, your tired and not making any sense" He whispers and I can see that he is also tired
"Cameron... You can stay here if you want, sleep on the couch, or whatever... I don't mind" I say sleepily and close my eyes
"It's okay, I will go to my room, sleep well Wolf" He says softly and kisses my cheekbone, which I think is odd, but I can't be bothered to think about at the moment. He brushes the hair from my face and moves to the door
"Night" I whisper before he leaves and he gives me a small smile before shutting the door quietly behind him and before long I am drifting into a deep, dreamless sleep...