Our Selection

Chapter 6

I go to bed early as I am too nervous to eat and I still feel sick from the thought of what the Prince could do to me. I hear Luca and Alex go to bed and that's when I know I can go out. I pull my window open as silently as the rusty screws will allow and I stand on the window sill and push myself up with ease, I have done this numerous times in the past and I would not be suprised if Alex had either, he can use his window and they both come out onto a small slope which leads to the flat roof. The night is cold and bitter but I don't feel it, I don't think I am physically able to feel anything, I'm too worn out. I look out over Six and only a few flickering street lamps illuminate our Caste. None of us in Six can afford electricity so at night it's the best time of day. Alex loves the night and I think that's where my love for it comes from too, everything is peaceful and quiet. There are no obvious boundaries between us all. A sharp screeching sound wakes me from my daydream and I tense up ready for a fight. I hear Alex before I see him as he struggles to close the window quietly to avoid waking Luca and he curses under his breath, I relax and his mutters bring a smile to my face. He climbs onto the roof and sits next to me
"You haven't been up here for a while have you?" He says while gazing into the distance as if already in another place
"No... How could you tell?" I say suprised and narrow my eyes at him
"Your loud, not as sneaky as you used to be" He smirks
"Oh shut up, just because your too fat to get up here" I tease and he pulls up his shirt and reveals his six pack
"You sure about that?" He grins and I punch him in the arm
"Stop it" I laugh and he drops his top and he laughs quietly to himself before turning to me
"I'm sorry I have been ignoring you... I'm just so scared that when you leave, I'm going to fall apart, your the only one that keeps this whole thing from falling apart and most of all... I need you" He whispers and he hides it well but I am sure I hear his voice crack. I lean my head on his shoulder "I know you do, but your going to be fine, work hard and I'm going to try and send you money from the palace... Please don't let Dad make anymore soup, its disgusting" I say trying to make him feel better but he doesn't laugh. He looks away and I see the tears in his eyes which makes my stomach clench. Alex never cries... He didn't even cry when Mom died, he just locked himself in his room for weeks and refused to eat, so seeing his so vulnerable made something inside of me break.
"Don't do this Wolf, dont act like you don't care... You do and something is bothering you. What is it?" He asks softly and I feel that it is only right to tell him
"They said if the Prince demanded anything from me... When I say anything, I mean anything... I have to accept, I can't turn him down" I whisper shakily and I feel Alex stiffen beside me and he takes a sharp breath. I'm not sure if I should of told him this or not as I don't want him to worry, but he asked and I promised to myself that I would never lie to him.
"That little fucker" He mutters under his breath and he clenches my hand tighter, this has always calmed him and so even though it hurts I ignore it. He turns to me with fire in his piercing eyes
"If he ever hurts you or does anything to make you feel uncomfortable... If he kisses you or touches you, I will kill him. No matter how many guards I have to take down, no matter what the consequences are... Okay? I will not let him break you" He says quietly trying hard to fight his anger. I put my hand on his cheek to calm him down
"I promise... I will not let him hurt me, He couldn't even if he tried" I say trying to comfort him and some of the anger from his eyes seem to disappear. He gives me a small smile and hugs me tightly
"I love you Wolf" He whispers and I can tell he is nearly over the edge. He can't handle much more.
"I love you too" I say softly and I pull away ready to go back to my room. I can see the panic in his eyes as he realises he has to be alone and my heart breaks a little more.
"Alex... Don't leave me?" I say quietly and I see relief flash across his face
"Don't worry, I won't" He whispers and I climb down into my room and he follows me. I lie down on the bed and he does the same and pulls me in for a hug which I refuse to pull away from. My head is buried in his chest and I can smell fire and the forest. This smell I am suprised to realise is the one that I have started to associate with home. His steady heartbeat is all I need to lull me to sleep and within minutes I have fallen into a deep dreamless sleep.