Dead Set - Book 2 of a Zombie Reverse Harem

Chapter Twenty

CHAPTER TWENTY

AGNES LEFAY

Jay looked even worse in the light of the fire. The warm glow showed exactly the lack of it in his hollow cheeks. The shell of the man that he was with Connor only an hour ago. A sob caught in my throat as realization that my plan B was now more than likely to be our plan A. All eyes were now on me, patiently waiting to drop the bomb that I currently held in my hands.

"Guess i'm going first then." I laughed nervously trying to ease the tension but failing miserably. I was only wishing the night before that my guys could read me as well as they do each other and by the looks on their faces, my wish had unfortunately come true. Damn it!

"Shit." I cursed under my breath "Where do I start?"

"Just say it." Blake, impatient as ever, blurts out "Don't try and soften your words, just tell it like it is."

Just tell it like it is. I can do that. It's going to suck however I say it. Fancy words aren't going to change the outcome of what needs to be done. I can do this. Just tell it like it is. Taking a deep breath in, I released the verbal diarrhea on the exhale.

"The-infection-has-taken-ahold-of-Jay's-right-leg-and-the-antibiotics-aren't-working-and-it's-spread-past-the-black-line-too-quickly-and-I-can-only-think-of-two-ways-to-stop-it-from-killing-him-amputate-his-entire-leg-or-an-alternative-method."

All my words blended into one long word and all three guys just stared back at me with dumbfounded looks on their handsome faces.

"I'm going to lose my leg or die?" Jay's voice was small but the fear was unmistakable. Guilt washed through me at not pulling my words like I had originally planned.

"Fuuuck!" Blake ran his hand through his thick black hair as my words sank in.

"Wait." Connor sits up straighter to look at me "What's the 'alternative method'?" he asked, marking the air quotes with his fingers. Trust him to pick up on it first. Well, suppose it was now time for the hard part. Three sets of hopeful eyes looked to me for the answer that will save their best friend's life and his leg.

"The infection will only spread in living tissue." I swallow back the bile rising in my throat as my next words threaten to choke me. "If I bit him-"

"No fucking way!" Blake roars "Not fucking happening, Princess!" He stands straight up out of his chair, pointing his finger at me in accusation. "We will chop off his fucking leg, I won't let him become a monster!"

His words were like a slap to the face. Is that how he saw me? As...as a monster... Is that why he finally deemed himself worthy of me because I was a monster like him? Pain lanced through my chest and tears filled my eyes. I quickly swiped at them with my sleeve, hoping to catch my vulnerability in the fabric before anyone could see. I flinch as the vitriol continues to spill from his lips. I hadn't realized that he had hated me as much as he hated himself. I was so fucking naive. I thought he had been learning to love himself, the way he had learned to love me but instead the playing field had just been evened and we were now both as bad as each other in his eyes. Val always said that there was a fine line between love and hate and I guess Blake had just proven it.

I sat still with my hands in my lap as Blake paced the room ranting to no one and everyone. My fingers, pulling on the thread of my shirt as I watched his every step. I could see the ridged lines of the muscles in his back, showing how tense and angry he was. I wish I had kept my mouth shut. If I had, Blake wouldn't hate me right now and my heart wouldn't be breaking.

No. I had to tell them. It's a way to save Jay and his leg if it works and at least now I know how Blake truly feels about me. I suppose now was better than later down the line when I was even deeper in love with him. Who am I kidding! I am already head over heels, batshit crazy in love with him. With all of them. A tear finally cuts it's way down my cheek but I don't have the energy to wipe it away this time.