Aurelia

The beginning

"Just because you're alive doesn't mean you aren't dead" my mother whispered morbidly, her voice barely more than a rasp. She lay on the stark white hospital bed, her usually sunlit hazel eyes now dull and empty, signaling the end. The afternoon light streamed through the window, casting a harsh glow that contrasted sharply with the pallor of her skin.

I stood at a distance, my arms crossed tightly over my chest, trying to contain the whirlwind of emotions inside me. Anger, frustration, and helplessness twisted together, making it hard to breathe. I couldn't bring myself to hold her hand, to offer any comfort. She had given up, and that made me furious.

Her hair, once a golden brown cascade, lay limp and lifeless against the pillow. She turned her head slightly to look at me, her gaze heavy with the weight of unspoken words and finality. The room was filled with the sterile scent of antiseptic, the beeping of the machines a constant reminder of the thin thread keeping her here.

"I know you're angry," she continued, her voice a fragile whisper. "But sometimes, fighting just means knowing when to let go."

I stared until she drifted off to sleep, the heart monitor alerting me she was still here gave me some peace. At tender age of only 14, I felt true hatred, as I had gazed into my mother's eyes finding not even the slightest semblance of regret for leaving me with no one.

sadness embraced me, as hatred coddled my broken heart.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Three years has come and gone since mother was laid to rest, in the end, she gave up. A year before her death she was diagnosed with breast cancer, the doctors had caught mother's cancer at the very Begining and all would have been well having she not denied chemotherapy.

She was a coward.

I never did cry or plead when she made the selfish decision, I instead stood by her angrily until she ceased to be.

months before her demise she started rambling on about her hatred for the mythical creatures that basically lived above us and deemed themselves superiors to us, humans. Mother hated them, hated that they treated us like the animals we truly were.

Truthfully humans werent very different from these monsters the one true difference evident was that they owned their monstrosity.

Mother would never hear it though because she believed humans were gods amongst these 'abominations" which I agreed too so she didn't waste energy trying to argue with me, I listened keenly to her rambles and warnings but never truly hearing them.

After her death, I was sent to a  Bridge-hall orphanage where I spent the remainder of my dreary childhood. Through the offered help of a kind soul I knew a semblance of warmth.

This however was only my beginning.