War (Cashton)

five.

Going from school, to work and then back home to help look after his younger siblings had been hard enough during high school, but that Ashton was in university that stress only seemed to increase 10 fold. Ashton thought he was prepared for it, but he hadn't experienced it yet. The pressure felt like it would not ease any time soon. 

There was a part of Ashton that thought perhaps he should just drop out of university, that he could just go in a few years time when his siblings are older and don't need someone around all the time. Or, when his siblings could also help their mother with bills, cleaning and dinner. It was tempting, to just work in the diner downtown full-time, or to just return back to the mechanic he'd worked at all through high school. However, Ashton knew his mother would never allow it. That woman was selfless, she would let herself go hungry before Ashton could ever drop out of university. 

Going to university had almost always been Ashton's dream, or at least his longterm plan in life. Having had very few things go his way until the age of nineteen, it only seemed fair to his mother that he would get to make the most of this opportunity. 

However, Ashton was exhausted and it was beginning to show. Ashton had hoped to pick up some work during the weekends at the mechanic down the road, but he couldn't bring myself to get out of bed earlier than 10am when his mother would need Ashton home for a few hours to look after his siblings. So, instead Ashton stayed until the early hours of the morning at the diner and took up whatever odd jobs he could find. 

Ashton's leg made it hard sometimes. There were mornings where he could barely get out of bed because of the pain or cramps that ravaged all up and down his left side, there were some days where Ashton couldn't even move it. There were also the days where Ashton couldn't sleep a wink because every time he closed my eyes all he could see what the bloody scenes of war, and hear the sounds of guns and desperate yells in the silence around him. Those are the hardest days because Ashton knew there was nothing he could do other than suffer through it. 

Having university to go to was good in some ways, it forced Ashton's mind elsewhere and kept him busy when his body wouldn't let him go anywhere. Although he often felt guilty for choosing education over full-time work to help his family, Ashton was thankful his mother wouldn't allow him to give up that dream, even if he was suffering. 

"Ashton," a voice spoke, bringing Ashton out of a daydream. Ashton had been falling into those a lot; getting lost in his head. "You're done, you can go home." 

"Oh," Ashton spoke, running a hand through his tangled curls. Ashton stood up and turned to face the person who had spoken to him, Jess, a red headed women who owned the diner with her husband. "Thanks Jess, I'll see you tomorrow night." 

"You don't have to come in, you know," Jess said giving Ashton a pointed look as she often did when she tried to mother him. Ashton had known the woman for most of his life, having worked the odd job for her during high school and her closeness to Ashton's mother. One of her sons had been Ashton's age, they had once spent a lot of time together as kids so their mothers were of course friends because of it. But, he had been sent off to Vietnam and nobody had heard from him since. "You're exhausted, Ashton. I can see it in your face, I can also tell that leg of yours is causing you a lot of pain. You should go to the doctor and take a day off."

"You know I can't do that, Jess," Ashton smiled at her. Taking a day off of work could mean one less meal or bill unpaid for in the Irwin household and Ashton didn't want to risk that. Going to the doctor would cost more than Ashton made in a shift, tips included, so he definitely couldn't do that. "I'll be fine, just need a good sleep 'sall."

Jess gave Ashton a look that said she was unimpressed but didn't have it in her to argue with the young man anymore. 

"If you look this tired tomorrow, I will not be letting you work another shift until next week," Jess said matter-of-factly, she would always threaten Ashton like that but thew both knew that she wouldn't force Ashton to stay home. She knew he needed the work. "Oh, before you leave, take this home with you. You kids deserve a treat."