10. flying

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"You can fly?" Noah squeaked.

I glared at Ivy. "I wish you would stop putting it like that."

She shrugged. "He's in denial," she told Noah. "He calls it 'lifting.'"

"It is lifting. You make me sound like Superman, doing loops in the air or something. It's not like that. My magic lifts me, that's all."

"Can I see?" Noah asked hopefully. Even in the dark, his eyes were bright. I couldn't have said no if I'd wanted to.

"Later," I grumbled. "Aren't we here because of Ivy?"

Ivy blushed. She always grew self-conscious when we talked about her magic, like it was some sort of embarrassing disease. She still kept it inside the bounds of spells when she was around others. Only here, in the dark, above the sleeping university, would she let it be free.

"Aven's been mentoring me," she said sheepishly. "Helping me control my magic."

Noah blinked at her. "But you've the best control over your magic of anyone I've ever met."

"That's sort of the problem," she sighed. "I've been squeezing it into spells all this time. Hurting it, kind of." She was quiet for a moment, and then she opened her palms. Small balls of red fire sat in them, perfect spheres. She let them roll across her fingers.

"That's brilliant," Noah breathed.

Ivy smiled, tossing the balls into the air. They swerved and danced in the sky like fireflies, then burst like fireworks above our heads. Noah stared, entranced, as little sparks settled in his hair.

"So that's what you've been doing every night?" he asked me. "Mentoring Ivy?"

"Not every night," I said defensively. "Mostly I just ... come out here alone."

"He comes out to fly," Ivy whispered to Noah.

I groaned. "It's not flying." I let my magic push me off the roof, feeling its pressure on the soles of my feet. "See?"

Noah gaped at me. "Aven! You're flying!"

I dragged a hand down my face. Ivy was pooling her magic around her own feet, trying to see if she could do it, too. She wouldn't have much luck. Even Áillun had never been able to lift herself.

"Take me up with you," Noah blurted out.

"What?" I thumped back down to the roof. "No."

"Please?" he begged, giving me the biggest, saddest puppy eyes I'd ever seen.

"No," I insisted.

"Please?"

God, I was weak. "Fine."

He jumped with excitement. "Thank you! What do I do?"

"Come here." He stepped up to me. "Closer." I set my hands on his waist, holding on tight. Then I gathered my shadows beneath him, and pushed us both into the air.

Noah shrieked, his arms flying around me. His nails dug through my shirt and into my skin. "Oh my God," he whispered, his eyes shut tight.

I chuckled, growing our small pedestal of magic into a large cloud. "You're not going to fall," I told Noah. "Look."

He pulled back and peeked down, his breath shaking. His knees wobbled a little, and he stumbled; I let him grab hold of my hand.

He took a deep breath and crouched slowly, not letting go of me. He pressed a hand to the mass beneath us. "It feels like ... " He shook his head, and I understood. There was no word for it. It was misty, but solid; soft, but strong. It was shadow incarnate.

I sat, swinging my legs over the edge. Noah gripped my hand like I might jump off. "Careful," he pleaded.

I lay back, tugging at Noah until he did the same. It was a clear, cloudless night, one of the first we'd had all month, and the stars shone like they never had before. We were above Olden's roofs, above its trees; there was nothing between us and that endless sky.

"What if Jonah's right?"

I looked at him. The stars shone in his eyes. It felt strangely intimate, holding someone with my magic. I'd never done it before.

"What if I don't belong here? I'm so—so useless compared to you and Ivy."

"You're not useless."

He wouldn't look at me. "Dame Ethelia believed in the goodness of humans. She wanted to share the world of magic with them." I closed my eyes, knowing where this was going. "Then a boy in her village fell sick, and she healed him with magic. They burned her alive."

"Noah ... "

"This is your sanctuary," he said, gesturing down to the university. "I have no right to be here."

"Noah." I reached over, turning his cheek and making him look at me. "You have more love for the magical world than anyone I've ever met. All of our histories sat there in the Library covered in dust until you showed up. If anyone in the world deserves to be here, it's you."

He sniffled a little, but nodded. "Thanks."

I tugged at the black bandana tied around his forehead. "What is this, by the way?"

Noah mustered up an indignant look, gesturing to himself. "I'm a ninja, didn't you notice?"

I coughed to stifle a laugh. He was indeed dressed head to toe in black, including a fanny pack at the side of his waist. "But why?"

He huffed. "You said 'Meet me on the roof at midnight.' How did you think I would dress?"

I shook my head. "So what's in there?" I asked, pointing.

Noah clutched the fanny pack protectively. "Just a first aid kit."

I smiled at him, a real smile that made his eyes widen a little bit, but I couldn't stop. "You're such a dork."

Slowly, shyly, he smiled back.

∆∆∆

Staring at stars and trying my hand
Thinking the thoughts of a useless man
Young and wild and growing old too soon
And asking the questions like who hung the moon

Who Hung the Moon (Jamestown Revival)

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