valentine

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To my love,
First I should do the correct thing and ask, will you be my valentine? Now I know we've discussed this, and last I asked, you said yes, but still things can change. I've been stressing over what to do for you, something, you'd love. While I might think to do something meaningful, and get you a very beautiful thing, I could also make you something, perhaps a small collection of things that I know you love. But, looking to do something like that, might not hold as much as say a song would. Still I find that the song may not bode best as, I'm forever scared and you're forever a more private person. It still won't change the fact I want our first Valentine's day together, to be memorable. In my heart, as you've come to see, I'm a hopeless romantic. I love the idea of falling in love, the feeling of being so close. Yet now, what I find I want is you.

Something I heard struck me- now I know you know I'm not much of a spiritual person, but I'm open to good ideas if I hear them. What this person said was, there will be that one person who you are irrevocably intoxicated by. That there will be that one person who always is a wonder and amazes you. I can't help but think of you. To tell the truth, all I think of these days is you. Someone ordered something from work, who had a similar name to yours, and I had hoped it would be you who walked in. While, as I'm sure you know, it wasn't you, I still desperately hoped it would be. So, all of that got me thinking. What should I do for you this Valentine's day? I'd write to you, all I love about you. Every bit of you I've tried to memorize, every bit of you that makes me remember how much I love you. Every piece of you that I am intoxicated by. From the stupidest of things, to the best of them. From the things I know you're not the fondest of, to the things you're proud of. Now, I'm not doing it here, in case you see this before I get the chance to give you the gift. I don't think this should ruin it much at all, because, you still don't know what it might say, or how it will be done. But what you do get is, I want this to be like a photo you have in your wallet that you pull out because it helps comfort you. Something you look at when you're having a rough time because it helps make you smile. Something you use to remind your self of just, how amazing you are. Something you'll remember for the rest of your life. I want you to have this gift, and let it never be copied, let it's beauty never run out. I want it to be a precious thing that if it got destroyed, we could cry together. I want this to be something that, when we're apart you see and think of everything good. I want it to be worth more than anything else I could do, something I'll never top because, the genuinity and the heart in it, will never have a chance at being matched. Something extravagant because of me, and quiet and private for you. I want it to be the one thing you'll grow old with. If not myself.

I love you with more than I am, and that's okay. I'll keep looking at you, and seeing more than the mirror may tell you. I'll always be intoxicated by who you are. And that's okay.

sincerely,
me

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