Miles Away

Chapter 14 - Path of the Unknown

Chapter 14 
Ella 
Path of the Unknown

My hand trembled as I held the phone in a sweaty palm. I had these nervous butterflies taking flight in my stomach, and I was close to nausea.

I couldn't understand how my life had taken a turn down this sharp passageway. What had I done to deserve all of this hurt, this distraught, this confusion? I had my life planned to a T and it was like a puzzle piece that you tried to force down, but could never actually get to fit. Nothing was working; the plans weren't set in stone any longer.

I didn't want to talk to Jagger any longer. I wanted to completely erase him from mind's eye, from the hole in my heart that he dug for himself. I wanted to be able to get over him and get the hell out of Everest Hills for good. I needed to leave all of this pain and discomfort behind as a whole. Everest wasn't a place for somebody like me. I wasn't one for gossip, for drama. I wasn't a perfect fit for this place, with these people.

It felt like days as I waited for Jagger to knock on my front door. I hadn't uprooted myself from my earlier position on the couch. My hair was unwashed; the clothes I was wearing were all ratty and dirty. I hadn't even thought to look in the mirror while I waited for him to come over. I didn't care how I looked, but more of how I felt. I wondered what I was going to do with myself.

How does someone go about dealing with situations like these? How does a head-in-the-books type of girl end up being so entangled to an uprising rock star who couldn't give less of a shit about her?

Charlee appeared from my bathroom, giving me an uneasy grin. It was forced; there was no doubt in that. She played with a tendril of hair nervously, eyeing me with patience I hadn't seen her use before. She was usually so bubbly and bright, all white smiles and wide eyes. This time, you could practically feel the nervous energy radiating off of her. She sat herself across the room from me, on the farther couch.

While she twisted a string of an old throw blanket lying next to her, she finally spoke to me. "So what are you going to do?"

I sighed heavily. The amount of weight pushed upon my shoulders was so agitating. For a girl like me, who had plans and a future without boys and entanglements, things like these shouldn't be happening to me. I shouldn't be this confused and hurt. I shouldn't have to be the one to back down and having to reach Jag first. He should be begging at my feet, begging for my forgiveness.

"I don't know," I whispered, playing with the ends of my long-sleeved shirt.

I didn't know why it was happening. My best friend and I couldn't seem to look each other in the eye. We were busying ourselves with throw blankets and articles of clothing, instead of facing the biggest elephant placed in the room. For the first time since we've known each other, we were speechless.

"I think I should get going. His flight's landing soon. Call me right after okay? Don't use this as an excuse to walk right out of my life, Ella Montgomery, alright?" She pushed, getting up from the couch to cross the room and wrap her arms around me tightly.

I felt a well known wave of nostalgia hit me as she wept lightly on my shoulder. I followed suit in her example of holding it together as she patted down my hair with nimble fingers. After what felt like hours, she finally pulled away, wiping the smudged eyeliner from underneath her lids. She laughed a little as she finally took in the situation in full.

"I'll call you," I murmured, nodding my head.

She gave me a small smile before she grabbed her bag from the couch she was last sitting and threw me one last glance before walking out, leaving me all alone with the demanding thoughts. They all came in a rush as soon as I heard the door click, signaling that I really was alone. I was feeling more alone than I ever had in my entire life, and this wasn't like me to feel so.