VICE

Chapter 38

Was everything he said last night a dream? A lie?

The door of the bathroom shut tight and I heard the water of the shower start a minute or so later. I pulled the sheets over me and lay back down. I blew a strand of my hair away from my face and stared at the ceiling. I don't know if I'm just being crazy but to me it looked like he was gonna say something nice and thoughtful  but no, just classic Ivy jumping to conclusions and overthinking everything. Then it dawned on me.

I was just another fuck

Thats was it, I was just another girl to cross off the list. I told him I liked him and I gave him the go ahead. He knows I've had previous with Nikki and he must have just assumed I was easy. I thought he knew I wasn't like that. Maybe not. Last night made me feel something I had never felt before but now I feel like it is tarnished in some way. I lay there feeling my eyes begin to water. I sat up and grabbed my bra and panties and put them on followed by my dress. I pulled it all the way up my front from the bottom to top in one swift zip!

Luckily the shower was still heard running so I had time. I didn't want to stay here any longer, I needed time to myself. I tiptoed around the room to find my shoes and grabbed them jogging to the door. I opened it with ease and poked my head outside to see if anyone was in the hall. Luckily the coast was clear. I closed the door behind me and ran for room 60. When I got to the door I knocked and knocked until the door handle began to turn. It opened to a sleepy Tommy.

"Woah, hey! Do you know what time it is?" He groaned and I pushed past him to get in the door.

When I walked in I dumped my shoes on the floor and paced. He closed the door and followed me in. He rubbed his eyes and looked at me

"Wait, is that not what you were wearing last night?" He pointed and I nodded

"I fucked up Tommy." I blurted and but my nail as I paced again

He looked at me with a blank expression then his mouth went into the shape of an 'o'. As if he had just registered what was going on

"Woah, hold on...is that a walk of shame outfit?"

"Oh my goddd' I whined and flopped on his bed. Vince woke up from the other single bed beside us. I sat up and greeted me

"I fucked up."

"How?"

I took a deep breath before answering. "I slept with Slash last night."

Tommy gasped like a woman. "Dude!!" He yelled and I put my head in my hands

"Was it good?" Vince asked and I sat up again

"Yeah...it was mind blowing." Tommy chuckled and nodded. "But I think it was a mistake."

"How come?" Vince day up straight and moved his bleach blonde hair over his shoulder.

"Well- I I don't know it's complicated..."

"Just tell us why."

"Slash and I have always had a little..." I tried to find the words

"Thing?" Vince squinted and I nodded

"Yeah! A little thing. And when I came back and met the guys again I don't expect the thing to still be there. And I thought that he felt it too, and we had all of these moments and then it was as if it all boiled over the surface and we ended up sleeping together after we left the club last night... but just when I thought it was different, I'm pretty sure I was just another girl on his radar that he hadn't touched yet." I sighed and felt the tears come again but I didn't let them escape my eyes.