Internet Girlfriend || josh Richards

26. I love you I'm sorry pt 2

it's been a few days since I've caught Josh and elanor. He has tried to talk to me with every chance he got, whether it was through school, if he saw me outside my house, trying to face time me, and I'm pretty sure he's left a lot of texts and voicemails.

I on the other hand have been avoiding him, he wanted to rip out my heart and give it to the person I hate the most then fine. I don't need him, I've got sam. and Sam has been awesome. he stays with me and makes sure that I'm safe, sometimes we go out on something you would call a date but it was just us hanging out, nothing sedimentary happened on those 'dates.'

sometimes I think back to that night at the party and think about what would happen if I didn't find them like that, would they have gone further. then I start thinking back to all the memories and everything he's ever said to me. it broke my heart to know that all of that was gone because he made a stupid mistake that broke my heart into millions of pieces.

currently I was doing just that. sitting on my bed listening to a Playlist of a mixture of sad songs by 5 Seconds of Summer and One Direction thinking of everything, sam was with me like he had been for nearly a week.

"did he ever actually love me?" I say out loud turning my head towards sam. we where both laying in my bed staring at the ceiling.

"oh, yeah" he chuckles in the word 'oh'. "what is that supposed to mean?" I ask sitting up.

"it means that he would never shut up about you, he loved you the moment you to met the first time. he told me everyday 'she's not like any other girl I've met, she's beautiful, and funny, and spontaneous, oh my god she makes me crazy'".

"he's said those thins" I said a soft smile trying to creep up.

"yes, at least 4 times a week."
he chuckles as he makes the statement.

"y/n he's in love with you, I don't know what was going through his head when he did what he did. but I'm telling you he would never shut up about you" we both share a laugh at what he said.

-

sam left a few minutes ago and to be honest i wanted to talk to josh, I wanted him to explain himself, I needed to know what happened.

I slipped on my vans and put on a hoodie, I didn't see what hoodie it was because it was dark, but once I got into the family room I could see what u was wearing. josh hoodie, it still smelt like him and every single thing of this hoodie came to mind, like him wearing me never wanting to take it off.

I was so lost in my thoughts that I was already at josh house and didn't even realise it.

I take a deep breath in and slowly walk up to his front door knocking a few times. I heard loud and fast running I'm guessing was josh because he could have seen me walking.

the door swings open and there stands a broken down, tossed hair, red eyed, puffy face josh.
"oh, um h-hey" he says stuttering like crazy.

"hey"

"um, what are you doing here?"

"I wanted to apoligize for yelling at you and didn't let you explain" he took me inside and we slowly went up to his room.

"so you're here so I can explain myself" I nodded as he grew the biggest smile.
he say down on his bed and I followed.

"before I start, I just wanted to day, I'm really-really sorry. I did not want you to walk in on that. I was looking for you at the party and I had a bit of a lot to drink so it made my vision very blury." he looked up at me as if he was waiting for a reaction, I just nodded my head not knowing what to say.
"then I ran into ela-also I'm extremely sorry about asking you if it was fine to take her. it was a douche move, I just thought that since I thought she changed amd that we could go as friends, but she thought that you and I had broken up. but yeah, I ran I to her thinking it was you. she had nearly the same dress shoes and her hair was the same way. but when she kissed me it didn't have that spark that it always has when we kiss. I'm sorry, I thousand times and if I could take it back I would in a blink. I wish I had never even thought of going to the party especially with her. "his voice started breaking and tears started to brim his eyes and I could feel his pain in my chest, it's the same wayI felt when I kissed sam.

"I love you y/n and I would never want to change that, but my drunk self doesn't know the difference between right or wrong. I try to contain myself but it's hard when you drink for the first time" I let out a low giggle.

"you looked beautiful last night, none-the-less"

"thanks, you didn't look to bad yourself." we both shared a small laugh. "well I guess were even, since I only caught you two kissing and I kissed sam"

"yeah, could you please forgive me" he asked begging I looked him in the eyes and smiled nodded my head softly "yeah, you're forgiven"

"and can you take me back, I couldn't stand not being able to cuddle you, kiss you, touch you for just those few hours I don't know how I did it when we weren't together in the first place" him and I chuckled in unison.

"please y/n, I want to be able to call you my baby again, it kinda hurts when the one girl you where planning on marrying get pissed at you for making out with a slut" my heart pounder in my chest as he rambled on.

Marrying?

I hadn't thought about that, we where only teenagers, sure we where in that adult stage but, 18? we still act like kids.

"I don't want to be that kind of on off couple but I missed you too, so, will you be my boyfriend? again" I smiled

"of course I would" he laughed softly, and looked me in the eyes.
"can I kiss you?" he asked. I nod.

he placed his hands on my waist and pushed me down softly, I wrapped my hands around his neck and he gently brushed his lips against mine sending shivers down my body. he slowly pressed his lips against mine and deepens the kiss by sliding his tongue through my lips. I gently slide my fingers through his hair and tug slightly at the ends.

For the next few minutes it's just us playing tonsil hockey and nothing else. his parents weren't home and neither where his siblings.

MY CRUSH SMILED AT ME TODAY I'M NOT OKAYYYYY

any who I hope you enjoyed this which you probably didn't because my book is flopping so hard. anyway thank you so much for 34.9k reads thats crazy for a shitty story like mines. haha have a nice morning/evenibg/night whatever. please vote if you'd like and goodbyeeeee