Miss you, not.

V

Eddy arrived at the bus stop by foot. He was holding an umbrella. He didn't know why he came to the bus stop when he has convinced himself that Brett had already left. Perhaps it was just a hunch. Nevertheless, here he was, at the bus stop late in the evening, halfway soaked as the rain had turned into a thunderstorm at one point.

No signs of Brett.

Eddy breathed a sigh of relief. He wouldn't know what to do if-

Holding on to his thought, he saw a figure slightly hidden just behind the wall of the bus stop. He knew that silhouette anywhere. It was Brett.

Oh no..

A piece of his heart broke from seeing him waiting all alone in the cold.

He walked over to him quickly. "Brett, I can explain."

"Alright then. Explain." He had his arms crossed, his expression was cold and unfeeling.

"Karen. She asked for a favour at the last minute. I thought I could make it but it took a lot longer than expected and I completely forgot-"

"Okay sure, fine. I sent texts and left voicemails. You could've called me."

"My battery died."

"So? Make an effort and find a way!" Brett didn't care anymore, he was shouting at this point.

"Okay, there was absolutely no need to raise your voice. In the first place, why did you even wait for me when it obviously looked like I won't show up at all." Eddy blurted out, as if he wasn't in the wrong at all.

Brett's mind blanked for a moment. His expression turned dark and his eyes were soulless.

So he wasn't planning on coming? Did I mean nothing to him..?

"So you were planning on ditching me?"

"No, that's not the point—" Eddy had his hand in his face, exasperated.

"You," Brett pointed at Eddy, quite aggressively, might he add, "never promise me anything ever again." His face was hot, like it was burning. His throat felt tight as he tried his best to choke back the tears.

Eddy noticed how Brett's eyes looked a little red and how his hands are shaking slightly.

His voice was.. trembling.

Eddy has never seen Brett this tense before, almost never in their life long years of friendship.

Brett turned around, never wanting anything more than to leave the place as quickly as possible. His eyes sting, threatening to shed tears of frustration and disappointment. He was not low enough to let Eddy see him like this. It was best for him to leave before he started saying things he would regret resulting in irreversible damage. Before his heart broke even more than it already had.

Forget the books he had wanted to have a discussion with Eddy over coffee. Forget the long walk in the park he so looked forward to. And, oh how much had Brett missed those walks with Eddy. How much he enjoyed the presence of the other as they talked about everything and anything.

What was he so excited all by himself for? He felt like a complete idiot. For having expectations. For having hope. All he wanted at this very moment was the comfort of his bed. To probably cry himself to sleep while he tried to deal with his emotions.

"This is ridiculous, Brett. You're overreacting." Eddy said, louder so that Brett could hear from the distance between them.

Brett stopped in his tracks, gritting his teeth and clenching his fists.

Don't do this, Brett Yang. Just keep walking.. just.. Oh, what the fuck.

Brett turned around, to Eddy's surprise. "I say to myself every time that I don't care. But I always find myself back in this pointless, endless loop. I care so much, I didn't even realize it until it was eating me up inside."

Sara did say to "address the problems" so Brett was trying to do so, albeit spitefully, fuelled by a flurry of emotions

Eddy breathed in, as he spoke in a diplomatic manner, trying to calm the situation down. "It's just a date, Brett. I forgot because I had something more important to do. Can't you understand that?"

As if the universe was playing some kind of cruel joke, the heavy rain kept on pouring, and the wind blew strongly, mirroring the thunderstorm of emotions in Brett's heart.

"It's not about the date, Eddy! God!" Brett cried out, throwing his hands in the air. Eddy was now very concerned.

"This is about you being emotionally absent as a friend. Don't think I didn't notice you being so obviously withdrawn. From me specifically. We don't hang out as often, let alone have a decent conversation together. Do you know how painful that is for me?" Brett's expression was so heartbreaking, Eddy didn't have the heart to retaliate.

"I was starting to think that I did something wrong. Am I overthinking things? I don't know! Why am I like this?" Brett had his face in his hands, clearly distressed. Months of pent up frustration and confusion just came out all at once, and he couldn't control it.

Eddy knew Brett was right, so he was at a loss of words. Brett has shown a significant amount of effort into arranging meet-ups and hangouts. But Eddy just kept on deliberately avoiding them. Every time he saw Brett, he felt this warm feeling in his chest. It was.. different. Difference meant change and change meant uncertainties. He was scared. And so he distanced himself. He thought that this was the best for them both. Clearly, it wasn't. All of that lead up to this disaster.

They were both miserable. A pang of guilt hit him upon the realisation.