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i was abruptly awoken out of my sleep by loud banging. the storm was screeching loud, and my clothes weren't fully dry yet. i sat up quickly in alert, seeing three of our group at the barn door, resisting. the others with me at the campfire must've heard it too, because they all jumped up to go help, i followed right behind. i almost fell because i was so weak, but i made it.
my iron deficiency was so bad, my vision went in and out of blurs, this ain't good. between rick and rosita, and smushed by others behind me, i push with all my might with the barn door.
many walkers snarling all together was heard on the other side, which gave me a pretty good idea of why we were pushing. my arms wanted to give up, but i wouldn't let myself. i felt so weak, my legs felt heavy, like they were to fold any moment. being squished in between my group mates made the use of air low, and i felt nauseous. i wanted to throw up, or pass out. but i have to, i have to push forwards-
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awoken out of my sleep, i peeled open my encrusted eyelids. when i moved to stretch the pain in my muscles made it clear to me that last night wasn't a dream. that the heavy pushing and resisting was real, but what happened? i didn't remember stopping and going back to the campfire.
i slowly sit up from the uncomfortable floor, checking my surroundings. rick, michonne, carol, and the kids were still sleeping, they looked like they were okay, thank goodness. fighting through the intense pain all over my body, i stand up.
my arm on where my cut was hurt the most, i could barely move it—something was definitely wrong with the wound, and i was supposed to have maggie check it, but we both got off track and forgot. i moved towards the middle of the barn, sunlight peaked through the cracks, inferring that the storm was over.
i looked over, seeing daryl sitting at the back, tending to his crossbow. shifting uncomfortably towards him due to my aching back, i went slow. when i got closer daryl did a double take, subtle shock clear in his eyes. i let out a gentle chuckle, taking a seat right next to him, "what's so surprising?"
he shakes his head in confusion, "how the hell you movin'? at the barn doors yer' passed out." he explained to me, and my eyes widened in shock. i passed out?
why the hell would i pass out just minutes after waking up? it doesn't make any sense, it must be because of the wound. it could be infected, i've had no treatment for it whatsoever.
"you still remember her?" i ask daryl, grabbing his attention, "karleen?"
his facial expression was shown with subtle sorrow, he still thought about her, he didn't forget her, he still remembered her. he took in a deep breath, "everyday—why?"
i shrugged, "i don't know, i guess—," i shifted my body to face him, "i guess i was just thinking about how much she cared about us y'know? about you?" i chuckled, wiping a stray hair out of my face, "i really hope you do know how much she cared for you, she really did."
daryl gulped, his eyes moving to my face, "she really did care 'bout us, you and lola 'specially. after shane—all she wanted was for you two to live, be strong for this group y'know?" he shifted uncomfortably, "i hope that—she knew i cared 'bout her a lot, i jus' really wish she ain't die like that, so fast.." daryl clenches his fists, i could see his eyes water, "i ain't even get to say bye."
seeing daryl like this, hurt me. he didn't deserve to loose all these people that meant to him so fast, he didn't get to say bye to merle, to karleen, and beth. people he cared about most, i felt his pain. i placed a sympathetic hand on his shoulder, grabbing his attention at the feeling of touch, "she knew—daryl, she knew."
he didn't speak, just nodded, and laid his head on my shoulder very softly, he knew it was my bad arm. i chuckled lightly, laying the side of my head on top of his. and we just sat there, it was easy to tell daryl felt guilty about karleen. everyone knows he doesn't do well with talking feelings, or showing them to be exact, but we know he cares about us.
then with my sister, he cared about her, she knew that, he just thought she didn't. he thought for awhile that she died thinking daryl didn't care for her as little. but it wasn't true, that much i know now.
- !gif is of nikki having a heart-to-heart with daryl! awe a little brotp moment between daryl and nik💕
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