IronDad and SpideySon Oneshots Vol. 2 [REQUESTS ARE CLOSED FOR NOW]

How Much More Could I Lose?

Peter Parker POV

What is there to gain from sadness?

Nothing, at least in my mind. The despair is a chore, the loss of will to exist a burden, the inability to smile a setback. People tell me the point of sadness is to give happiness meaning, but what's the point if happiness doesn't come afterwards?

The lies that I have been told, the empty smiles I have been given, the pitied glances burned into my souls, the whispers when they think I can't hear, it's all I get everyday. Isolation isn't fun on its own, but it's worse when you're depressed.

The worst part is, no one does anything. Even Flash, who's usually picking on me daily, just gives me an uncharacteristically worried glance. It makes me furious. I want someone to hit me, scream at me, punch me, so I can do it back to them, and give away the pain to someone even for a little bit. I don't care how selfish that sounds, it's what I need. I need to harm someone. Something. Anything.

   Would Tony be proud of this? Of what I've become? Would he still look at me the same way?

   I wish I could've asked.
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235 words

Just a short angsty little monologue, don't mind me, I'll just put this here annnnndddd back to working on random poetry in another book on here because coping mechanisms byyyyeeeeee

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