Sebastian Bear (complete)

TEN

TEN

Madeline dreamt of Sebastian.

He was much younger. So was she. They were running through her backyard, laughter echoing through the overgrown rose bushes. Maggie had never been good at gardening but Madeline preferred it that way. She enjoyed the chaotic peace that came with nature. She spent most of that first year after her dad died outside, staring at the clouds in her own little organic wonderland. Then Sebastian had shown up with his strange eyes and contagious laugh and she was no longer quiet and alone. Her friend woke up a part of her that fell asleep when her dad died. He brought her back to life. She went from being trapped and breathless to running from Tigers in their own made-up jungle.

"I think we outran him," Sebastian panted. They were hiding behind a tree, tiny faces peeking around the trunk.

Madeline woke to the sound of thunder. Light echoed through the room, bouncing against her heavy lids. Sebastian was there, sitting by the window. She watched the rain cast watery shadows across his face. He looked younger, those brilliant purple eyes were blurry and unfocused.

"Seb?" Her voice seemed to wake him from his pensive reverie. He glanced over at her with a small smile before letting his gaze move back toward the stormy outdoors.

"What are you doing awake?" She sat up, watching him curiously.

"I was just thinking," he answered. His voice came out in a hushed whisper. "The rain here is so..." he paused. Madeline stayed silent, watching his eyes move across the paned glass. "It was raining when I got there."

She knew he was talking about Tres Manor. Her heart ached with the change in tone. He was sad, maybe even a little scared. She gulped down the questions hammering away at her tongue and let him speak.

"The rain there happened every two weeks. It serves a very specific purpose," he was so quiet. He had stopped talking again. Her curiousness got the best of her and before she could think to stay silent, she was asking him what he meant. 

"What purpose is that, Seb?"

There was a long beat where Madeline wondered if he heard her at all. Before she had time to question him again he responded in a dull whisper that sent shivers down her spine.

"To wash away the blood."

Chills ran down her arms and stopped short at her shaking fingers. What kind of horrible place had rain for such things? She hoped he was exaggerating but something about his demeanor told her otherwise.

"When I landed, there was so much rain and blood running down the streets," he looked down at his hands as if he was envisioning them dyed ruby red. "They dropped me in the middle of the Cities Center and the blood was everywhere. I could smell it. You know you can smell blood when there's enough of it. I could smell the fire too. There was always something burning. There was always thick black smoke and this sick rotting smell that was coming from nowhere and everywhere."

Madeline watched as his eyes moved back to the silent storm. He was pale, his black hair a stark difference to the ivory of his cheeks. "I was so scared and I hid for what seemed like forever. I just hid in the corner like some shitty little rodent waiting to be killed." 

Seb glanced at her for less than a second. 

"I found out later it was the safest time to be out really. It's loud and the smell of fresh soul is covered up by the rain. I could've been running out of the city and probably made it but I didn't know any better. I was just a kid. I was a dumb scared kid."

Madeline felt a tear fall down her face. She pictured him, ten and terrified. She closed her eyes, wiping furiously at the lone tear. Before she could think about it, she reached over and grabbed his closest hand. He looked down at their joined appendages. It removed him from his somber reverie for just a moment.

"I couldn't talk to my parents for a year."

"Why?" Madeline interrupted.

"Because I had failed my mortal. I failed you." He was looking away again. His eyes moved out the window. Madeline wished she could bring him back. She wanted more than anything to make him feel less bad but she knew it wasn't that easy.

"I met Lucian on the third day. He had been there over a year already, maybe even longer."

"Lucian was your roommate?" Madeline asked. Her hand was still covering his. She considered moving closer but decided against it.

"Yeah and kinda like my brother, my fucked up brother," Seb whispered more to himself than her. "I need to get him out. I promised him I'd try. I can't do that from this world."

Madeline cleared her throat, moving back to sit up straight. There was a part of her that wanted to tell Sebastian to go home. She wanted him to see his parents and his friends. She wanted him to move on with his life. There was also a more selfish part of her that wanted nothing more than to keep him as close as possible.

"Sebastian," she called his name softly. He looked at her automatically, his face a quiet calm that eased her mood. "Why don't you go home? I mean, I know you want to help me but you have to miss your family and friends. I know there..."

"It's not that I just want to help you," Seb smiled sleepily. "I love you more than I want to live. I always have."

"Sebastian," Madeline sighed. She was ready to argue his points or at least warn him off of whatever he was about to go on about.

"No. I understand that you have your wall and you're kind of a weird girl but I've loved you since we were kids. I've always loved you. I picked you because I knew I would love you." Sebastian shrugged as if it were the easiest truth in all the world. "I loved you enough to spend ten years in the place bad dreams are born just for the off chance I'd get to see you again. I'm not going anywhere."

Madeline was at a loss for words. After years of being too terrified to admit her feelings for Nolan, Sebastian dropped the L-word at least four times in one spiel. She nodded, not trusting her voice not to crack with his open admission. How could he love her? He barely knew her. She would've asked him had she thought his answer would bring her peace. If anything she would be left with a gaping mouth like the dumb fish that she was.

"As for seeing my family... I'm working on it." He nodded. He was back to his quiet reverie. Madeline smiled back at his perfect face, letting her hands fall against the sides of her thighs. With one more curious look out the window, Sebastian climbed up the mattress and let his head fall into Madeline's lap. He let an obnoxious yawn spill from his lips. He snuggled into the blankets. Madeline didn't even fight it, watching the rebellious springs of ebony curls twist around his ears and neck. She let her hands rake through those black curls, delighting in the chill bumps that formed along his collar. She smiled, resting back against the headboard. She loved the reaction he had to her touch. Even if she wasn't sure how he could love someone after missing them for so long, she let herself feel the sweet ache that came with love from such a beautiful boy.

She fell asleep like that, Sebastian's arms curled around her legs, her heart beating painfully against her chest.

The sound of rain and Sebastian's quiet breathing the last thing her waking ears took in. 

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