ATEEZ Say My Name | Oneshot BoyxBoy

8. Seonghwa x Wooyoung

TRIGGER WARNING: This story contains sensitive subjects such as depression, self-harm and suicidal thoughts. Know that you are not alone! I'm always there if you want to talk to someone! Also keep in mind that all of this is fiction.

Story plot: Seonghwa is very protective over Wooyoung. Why? Because he knows exactly what Wooyoung is thinking and what he's struggling with. After a while of being together, Wooyoung became depressed and the only person who knows about it is his boyfriend. Seonghwa is trying his best to protect his boyfriend from himself, but will that be enough?

They're all getting ready for another interview. Just by the looks of it, Seonghwa can tell that Wooyoung isn't excited about it. Seonghwa just finished his hair and makeup and pulls Wooyoung onto his lap kissing his neck softly. "I know you don't wanna do this this baby. I'll be sitting next to you okay?" Wooyoung nods and leans back against his boyfriend. It's not just that he doesn't want to do it, he hates everything about it. He feels uncomfortable, insecure and just really anxious. He's not planning to answer a question unless it's directed at him. The others seemed to have noticed something is going on, but he refuses to talk to them. He can talk to Seonghwa and that's enough because he wasn't really planning to tell him either.

Seonghwa feels a lot of pressure. He wants to be there for his boyfriend, which can be quite difficult since Wooyoung can push him away just like that, without any direct reason. All he knows is that it has something to do with his emotions becoming too overwhelming. It's always hard to tell if he really needs to leave Wooyoung alone or if he should stick by his side and help him calm down. 

During the interview Wooyoung smiles and laughs, just to show the world that he is doing okay. He doesn't want anyone to know in case he might seem weak. Seonghwa knows it's all an act and he misses the times where Wooyoung would genuinely laugh at things or just walk around with the brightest smile on his face. Seonghwa slides his hand behind Wooyoung and rubs small circles on his lower back, because he knows his boyfriend loves it when he does that. Seonghwa is basically keeping Wooyoung alive. For Wooyoung, his boyfriend is the only bit of happiness left in his life.

As the interview continues they share the positive and negative comments that are going around on the internet. Seonghwa bites down on his lip, wishing this subject didn't come up. He knows damn well that Wooyoung is not going to remember anything positive and will cling onto all the negativity. Meanwhile Wooyoung is trying to fight back the tears he feels prickling in his eyes.

Am I too much?  Am I being too loud? I'm really trying to be the best I can but, apparently I'm not. I'm just a burden to this group. It's not like they can't perform without me. Seonghwa is sexy, San can dance like nobody's watching. Why would they even need me? Maybe they never needed me in the first place... Wooyoung is lost in his own little bubble and doesn't say a single word for the rest of the interview.

As they wrap up the interview Wooyoung seems to have disappeared. He doesn't want to talk about the interview so sneaking out was his only option. Hongjoong walks over to Seonghwa, because the boy isn't blind. "Hey hyung, is Wooyoung okay? He seemed, I don't know, just like he wasn't there. I wanted to ask him but I can't find him anywhere.." Seonghwa made a promise to Wooyoung to not tell the others anything, and he isn't one of breaking a promise. On the other hand, he doesn't know how long he can keep this for himself and he sighs sitting down on the couch. He could trust Hongjoong right? I mean, he's the leader and Seonghwa knows he wants the best for all of the others. He grabs Hongjoongs arm dragging him into a small room, locking the door behind them. 

"You have to promise me that you won't tell this to anyone else. No others members or staff may know about this. Wooyoung trusted me with this." Hongjoong nods quietly, not knowing what exactly is going on here. "Wooyoung is uhm, how do I say this.." Seonghwa brushes his hands through his hair as he feels the comforting hand of his leader on his back. "No. My Wooyoung is not okay. Actually, he's far from okay. I won't go into too much detail because I promised I wouldn't even tell anyone. But he's just not feeling as happy as he used to feel. And- Wait, you can't find him anywhere?!" That can only mean one thing.

"I'm sorry we'll talk later! I have to find him!" Seonghwa unlocks the door and bursts outside asking everyone as calmly as he possibly can where Wooyoung is. He doesn't want to raise any suspicion but he needs to find his boyfriend, now. Finally one of the staff members says he left to go back to the dorms because he was tired "Ah thank you, I'll go check on him." Nothing they can think of that since Seonghwa always checks up on all the members.

Seonghwa walks as fast as he can back to the dorms and rushes inside "WOOYOUNGIE?! WOO BABY IT'S ME!" He shouts but there is no sound coming from any room. "Wooyoung baby talk to me. Where are you? Please don't hide from me." Seonghwa walks around trying to find his boyfriend. He locks the front door behind him and walks upstairs to the rooms. He knocks on every door and peeks inside hoping to find his boyfriend. As he reaches the last room he can't open the door. Fuck. "Wooyoungie babe please open the door. I know you don't want to talk about the interview because it was horrible. I promise we won't talk about it. Please let me in Woo." He bites down on his lip. Wooyoung and a locked door, that can only mean one thing. "If you don't unlock the door I will bash it in Woo I'm serious! I know you're struggling right now but I can't help if you don't let me in." Seonghwa is on the edge of crying, feeling hopeless and helpless until he hears the door unlock. He goes in locking the door behind them to make sure no other member can accidentally walk in on then. "Woo- oh god!" Wooyoung is sitting on his bed, shirt covered in blood and red puffy eyes from crying.

"I- it doesn't stop. I- don't know what to do." Wooyoung sobs as he looks terrified at his boyfriend. Seonghwa knows about the fact that Wooyoung cuts himself when everything gets too much, but he's never seen him like this before. "I wasn't trying to-" "Oh baby I know I know let me help you." Seonghwa kneels down beside his boyfriend. Knowing that your boyfriend does such a thing is one thing, but this is going to be the first time for Seonghwa to see it as well. Wooyoung always kept it hidden from him because he felt embarrassed about it.

Seonghwa grabs a towel and takes off the tissues Wooyoung was pressing down on his arm. Seonghwa was shocked to say the least, when he sees what his gorgeous boyfriend has done to himself. "Babe" is all he can say, he needs to be strong now and help his boyfriend. He wraps the towel around his arm tightly enough and ties a knot in it.

He cups Wooyoungs face in his hands kissing him softly and whispers "I still love you so much okay?" Wooyoung nods as he snuggles into Seonghwas arms. "But we really need to work on this you know that right?" Wooyoung nods again, knowing his boyfriend is right as he whispers "I know b- but I don't know how and where to start." "We can start off by talking to the members. I uhm, I promise I didn't say more than needed! But Hongjoong was worried about you and he hoped I knew more.." Wooyoung looks up "He was?" "They all are Woo.. Everyone is worried about you. I'm sure they will all understand it if you talk to them. They are about you as much as I do." "We.. We are going to talk to them. I don't wanna stand there alone and-" "Sshh easy baby, I'll be there with you. I'd never push you into that all by yourself. But how does that sound? And we'll see from there on what you need hm?" Wooyoung nods "Yeah.. yeah I think we can try that."

After some more cuddling Seonghwa cleaned up the bloody mess in Wooyoungs room so he won't have to see that any longer. "How about we get changed and join them downstairs? Maybe we can talk to them tonight if you want to." Seonghwa wraps his arms around Wooyoungs waist kissing him softly. 

Before they get ready to go downstairs Seonghwa removes the towel from Wooyoungs arm. "Let me take care of this first. I don't want you to get an infection there." He kisses Wooyoungs forehead and cleans everything up wrapping a clean bandage around his arm.

Wooyoung slides on a long sleeved black shirt with a simple t-shirt and Seonghwa puts on one of Wooyoungs oversized blue hoodies. "You look good in my hoodie." Wooyoung chuckles softly, a small smile appearing on that beautiful face. "It smells just like you, I like that" Seonghwa smiles pulling his boyfriend closer brushing his cheek softly with his thumb. "I love you Wooyoungie." "I love you too babe." Wooyoung smiles and kisses his boyfriend softly. 

A/N: I hope this oneshot was better than the last one. If you have any questions or suggestions, please let me know! I'm always open to any feedback. Sorry if this one is hella long, I wanted to compromise for the shitty one I put up yesterday.