Pangaea Academy: Same Old Brand New Frenemies (countryhumans) 【Under Editing】

Chapter 17 : Pistanthrophobia

[ STILL TO BE EDITED: THIS WILL BE GONE WHEN IT'S FULLY EDITED ]

____________________

When did it all start that I became afraid of being rejected? That was a decade ago, because of it, I had a fear that will never go away.

A decade ago we were both in a relationship, I was with a city girl, while Scotland was with a town girl. We were both crazily in love, but unlike me he has limits when it comes to love.

I gave everything to her, status, materials, love, affection, time, and my country, almost making her my wife but.. Not everything you plan will turn out the way it will.

When I did asked her to marry me, I never expected for her to reject me.. 

"But I'm not ready Ireland.. "

I told her "I'll wait.. "

But no, she used it to break up with me, recalling past mistakes even the tiniest detail of mistake she makes it bigger that she was the one who's been enduring the pain in our relationship, I didn't know, she never tells me anything that's why I didn't know.

I told her "I'll change! If you want space I'll give it to you!"

Instead of being rational, she didn't give a single fuck. She broke up with me cause she wasn't ready and I was being too forceful and I was rushing her? Bullshit.

Bitch is just a gold digger. Why? Well, after breaking up with me, I heard she was with another man now, a city boy as well, I was devastated. My first loved ended like that but, I was relieved in a way too.

Me and Scotland were miserable, his girl broke up with him as well because he lacks time with her, every night she haunts him, her lies would echo in his head and in his dreams, took a lot of therapy so that he'll recover from her.

While he was being recovered from his nightmare, I was being treated from my phobia, my fear of being rejected, I was in a worse state Because of her, and that's when my phobia begun..

I would laugh at myself whenever I would recall being with her, I can't believe I wasn't able to see through her lies and her words through gritted teeth. I'm an information professional, nothing can get past me yet why?

Maybe because I was blinded by love, its scary to think about it.

Then, school started. Pangaea was finally open, I live in the same dorm as scotland but we were in different classrooms which makes it boring in mine.

Everyday was monochrome, there was no color at all as if I started to question my own purpose and even lost my will.

But then she came..

Like I said, I met her when Mr. Prick asked me to give the papers to a certain room, I didn't even realize there was a girl in this all boys school of Pangaea.

But then I realized why, female country leaders are rare, there are a few in the whole world, so mostly in the female academy there are only female cities and towns from all around the world. She was accepted since she's a country leader, a royal one like everyone else.

I studied her country, her tradition her legends and myths, everything. It was so interesting to the point I would watch her everywhere, she is so naive but she isn't gullible.

I already started to like her but I'm still scared of being rejected, I know the people around her cares for her like I do, she just doesn't see it, if I could just fantasize or even watch her from afar, its okay. It'll be okay, I was almost satisfied by it..