𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝓃𝒾𝑔𝒽𝓉 𝓌𝑒 𝓂𝑒𝓉 - a #benjey story

Chapter XV

{ POV Jorge }

I almost couldn't believe Benji texted me after a month.

I was crying over that boy every night. I just missed his cuddles and his kisses and everything he did.

Every breath and wink, step and smile.

My emotions went crazy, I didn't know if I should be happy or worried.

I thought he just wanted me to come over so he could blame me again.

Instantly I got into the shower and dressed to be right on time. I looked into the mirror but my look moved down to my arms.

I almost forgot.

The short-sleeved shirt shews off too much of my skin, so I grabbed a long-sleeved green shirt from my closet and put it on.

I left the house at 16:40.

Outside it was windy but still warm. Too warm for a sweater at least.

In the last time, I avoided this way, the way to Benji's house.

Memories hit me and I cried again.

I am so scared of love and what it did to me.

I was almost at his house when I saw someone leave.

Was it Benjamin? I think so.

I started to walk a bit faster and tapped him from the back.

He turned around, his eyes were puffy and red.

For a few seconds, he just stood there in shock, then Benji put his arms around me and hugged me tightly.

"I am so sorry Jorge.", he whispered.

"For what?"

"I didn't care about your feelings and was being selfish all the time. I was hurt and said stupid things... of course, what you did wasn't great, but no one deserves to deal with their pain alone.", Benji said as he let go of me.

"One month ago Addy said the same", I mumbled.

"I guess I learned a lot from her.", he slightly smiled.

Benji took my hand and tried to lift up my sleeve.

"No!", I interrupted his actions.

"Please Jorge.", he looked me in the eyes and tried again.

He lifted the sleeve up to my elbow and covered his mouth with his hands.

"Jorge, I didn't know it was that bad.", his eyes filled with tears.

"It's not that bad...", I tried to avoid an awkward situation and pulled my sleeve down.

"You're right, it's even worse than bad."

"Don't mind it, please", I looked down.

"Jorge, but I do. It's my fault you did this."

"No, it's not, I made mistakes so I did it, for punishment, you didn't force me to."

"I know, but if I hadn't been so rude to you at the party you probably wouldn't have done it."

I looked at Benji. I wanted to ask him so many questions but in the end, I only asked one:

"Are you dating someone else? I mean it's none of my business, I was just wondering."

"What? No!", Benji wrinkled his face.

"Hm...", I mentally punched myself for asking this.

"Wait... ARE YOU?"

"Oh my god, NO", I said almost offended.

Okay, no. I think this is too much for me.

I know I'm sensitive and fragile.

Even tho I thought I could do this, I couldn't. I can't look at him in this way.
I could only look at him with boyfriend-eyes and it broke my heart.

"I think I need to go.", I turned around and started speedwalking.

"Don't lea-... wait what's wrong?", Benji noticed tears rolling down my cheeks.

He held my hand.

"Benji... please. I can't do this."

"Come here", he opened his arms for another hug but I pulled away.

"No, you don't understand. I can't deal with having you close to me. Don't get me wrong, I absolutely love having you around, I always did, but I know I can't have you and it makes my mind fight against my heart."

"Who says that you can't have me?", Benji looks almost confused.

"You fell out of love with me, Benji, don't play with my feelings, please", I sighed.

"Who says that?"

--------------------------------------------

I can't let y'all be sad like that so this needed to happen. ;)