Darkened House || Harry Styles

30. Misery Is All Narrated.

“Now we walk together, knowing where we’ve been. Knowing mistakes are being mistaken again, but it’s all in past tense, there’s no making sense of it now,” ---Lifehouse.

Chapter 30 // Misery Is All Narrated.

              (Harry’s POV)

I woke up the next morning, hoping I’d see that Isa haven’t obligated to my request and left as I told her to,

I hopped off the bed hurrying to the kitchen silently telling my prays that I’d witness her standing there making breakfast as I always do every day, but to my stupidity and bad of luck, I found no black-haired smiley girl there.

I searched in the living room, guest’s room, the bathroom, her own room and even the basement, but found no sign of her at all,

I didn’t even bother opening her closet to see if her clothes were still there, because I know for sure that her dignity wouldn’t put up with my nonsense anymore, I’ve taken it too far.

Losing my temper on her, taking all my anger at the past hurtful memories of mine on her, doing nothing but yelping and cursing at her direction,

How can a one bear with all that?

How did she even let herself live and interact with someone who has nothing but his dull life that lacks everything a girl has ever wished to have? How did she bear living with someone that has no future?

But now, she left, she realized how wrong she was to live with someone that uses swears and cuss words instead of sweet romantic ones,

She realized she couldn’t interact with someone who uses glares as responses for her ‘morning’ whispers.

But she put up with all that, yes she did,

She didn’t leave because she couldn’t take my toughness anymore, she left because I am, the stupid jerking asshole, told her to get away from me and leave to her father in France.

I plopped down on the couch feeling that my jelly legs couldn’t afford carrying me for so long, I put my head between both of my palms feeling myself so close to breaking down in a nearly river of tears.

She really did leave …

I can’t believe that I’ll never see her again…

She’ll no longer be there to help me sleep peacefully at night without any nightmares to be had,

She’ll no longer be there to make me tacos in the morning,

She’ll no longer be there to justify my rude attitude,

She’ll no longer be there to fill my lonely life,

She’ll no longer be there to let me see the sadness in her eyes even though she might smile,

She left before I could ask her about the reason that’s making her look so broken and so helpless yet so kind and tolerant.

Gosh, how could I be that stupid to let such a precious treasure slip away from me?

But I had to, I couldn’t let her break the walls I’ve been building between me and any girl for four years now,

I don’t even know how to justify my actions when she’s around and that’s literally making me lose my mind, like why the hell did I pay for her back when we were at the phone shop?

Why did I give her my mother’s expensive necklace when we were going to the party?

Why did I even agree to go with her in the first place?