Imbalance

▪︎Chapter Forty Seven▪︎

Lagging behind Londyn, I followed her to the nursery and watched her unwrap a sleeping Thyssen's blanket and placed him in his crib. It had been two days since he'd been born, and he and his mother were cleared from the hospital. Londyn hadn't said a word to me since leaving the hospital, in fact she hardly said anything to me since I'd showed up and her silence was killing. The air surrounding us had literally felt like it was suffocating me as I watched the woman I love maneuver around the house as though I was nonexistent.

"L." I tried getting her attention as we exited Thyssen's room and she journeyed to the kitchen. She fished through the refrigerator refusing to acknowledge my presence. I was slightly confused by her behavior. I hadn't necessarily expected her to welcome me with overwhelming love and affection but I thought she had at least forgiven me of my transgressions.

"Londyn." I blocked her path as she was about to acquaint herself with the living room.

"What TJ?" Annoyance laced her voice.

"Wassup? You've been giving me the silent treatment for a minute now." A sarcastic chuckled escaped her lips as she gave me the once over, her look of contempt not to be overlooked.

"What did you say to Khayo? And don't lie to me either." Her hand now firmly planted on her left hip. I sucked my teeth before responding, finding the reasoning behind her attitude towards me slightly ridiculous.

"I just told him he ain't fam, that's all. Nothing to trip about."

"NOTHING TO TRIP ABOUT?" Her voices rose several notches before she pinched the bridge of nose and took a deep breath hoping to pacify herself.

"TJ it wasn't your place to say shit to Khayo. He's been there for me in so many ways without me even asking, doing shit that should've been done by you. He took me to my birthing classes, been to my doctor visits, damn near coached me through labor!" She counted on her fingers as she spoke. I said nothing as she ran her fingers through her natural mane and started pacing. She then stopped abruptly and glared at me.

"So cat got your tongue now huh?"

"What you want me to say Londyn? You know the only reason you allowed him to do all that is cause I was locked up. You acting like it was my fault. If I had a say I woulda been free a long time ago and helping you."

"It was your damn fault TJ." She stated matter-of-factly and wedged a finger in the center of my chest.

"You wanted to be on some macho shit which ultimately landed you where you were." Her eyes stayed on mine, communicating a host of emotions that couldn't be conveyed through words. Most noticeable though were pain and anger.

"Come here." I motioned for her to come close. When she hesitated, I took her hand and gently brought her to my embrace. She didn't resist as my arms wrapped her waist. We stood in silence, moments later I felt shirt clinging to my chest as Londyn's emotions surfaced.

"Let me make it up to L. I'm a better man now, one who's well aware of his folly and promises not to make the same mistakes twice." Silence engulfed the room once more as her sniffles quieted and the tears subsided. She broke free from my embrace, and took a step back gaze into my eyes.

"Just make it up to me by being a good father to Thyssen." With that said, she retreated to her room and left me standing there. Though she appeared resolute, I had no intention on giving up. I wanted her to see that I'd really transform and was ready to be that she needed.

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"What's good pop?" I greeted as I waltzed into my childhood home. After deciding it was best that I give Londyn some space I decided to drop in on my parents. I hadn't seen much of them since my release as I spent most of my time at the hospital building a bond with my son.