WildeHood: A Zootopia and Robin Hood Crossover

Chapter 4

"Can you believe we finally got that last jewelry store thief!?" Nick's mouth vibrated with every word: his face was froze with a smile.

"Yeah, the last one until next week." Judy unlocked the door of her meager apartment, and lavender replaced the musty, old bookstore smell the rest of the apartment building was plagued with.

"You're welcome to stay. There's only, what, three hours left until daylight anyway."

"Oh no, Judy, I...", he contemplated to himself. "I need to go see Finnick. I promised."

"Oh, ok." She pushed the door all the way open and leaned on it. "Can we at least talk about that amazing shot you pulled off?"

"The DNA don't lie! I tried to convince you for months I'm related to Robin Hood." With that, he was already halfway down the hall, tail swinging violently, clearly from the pride of what that shot accomplished. He shot the chain on a faulty florescent light and crushed the jewelry thief's car. "Good night, Carrots. Don't let your neighbor's parasites bite!"

"Oh, no. Nick," Judy growled, almost legitimately angry.

Then it happened. The two oryx antelope brothers poked their horned heads out of the door. "Hey, guys! Nice conversation you got goin' on out here," one said with a voice like a metal chair scooting on a tile floor. "By the way, I always believed you, Nathan."

Nick turned with a smirk at Judy and took a few steps back towards them. "I tried to tell everyone before, but they wouldn't listen until I gave my blood samples."

"Well, I always believed you, Nate," the other said, in an equally beautiful voice.

"No you didn't! That was me!"

"Oh, you shut up!"

"You shut up!"

"You shut up!"

...

🏹

He almost felt sorry that Judy had to live in that old, musty building. Maybe one day, she and him could settle down in a place worth living in. You know, after he meets her parents. He may have forgotten that little detail.

Judy's apartment, even with its stuffiness and, more than likely, a few infestations, didn't seem too bad as he approached Finnick's van. Living in an alleyway in a van leads people to believe one of three things: you're either the scum of the earth, a good person who is too lazy to improve himself, or someone truly having a hard time they couldn't get out of. The second one was true of Finnick.

Knock knock knock.

The back doors swung open like a crack of thunder. "WHO IS...well, there he is! It's about time!" They fist bumped, which Nick always thought was awkward, but it made Finnick happy, so he did it for him. He used to make Finnick wear diapers, so he'd do that much.

"Finnick, aren't you proud of me? Who would've ever thought I of all people would end up the most successful cop around? A descendant of the world's most famous thief, a cop, and the best on the force at it. Bogo would be off his rocker not to give me a pay raise anytime now."

"Oh! Speaking of your money-"

"Oh, boy. Here we go."

"No, really. I've been thinkin', Nick. Look at you! You went from a street hustler to the most envied cop on the force in less than a year! I'll be honest with ya, I got jealous for a while, but that's when I realized I need to start doing better for myself."

Nick scratched the back of his head. "And...you need my money to do that."

"Yes."

He huffed. "Alright. Tell me what ya got this time."

"So, all I've got to work with is this van, right?" He patted the back rim.

"Uh-huh. But I see a dead bird over there if you're interested."

"And what is the one thing I'm real, REAL good at?"

"Pfft. Diaper modeling?"

"No! Cooking!"

Nick started to laugh, but stopped himself. "This is...the first I've heard of it."

"Don't you remember? I made us tacos all the time in high school."

"You bought tacos from that other fennec fox's stand without cheese, because you said his cheese was too expensive, then put cheese on it yourself."

"I did to make tacos myself after that!"

"Hmm...I don't remember it."

"You will!" He had reached back into the van and pulled out a delicately wrapped, hard shell taco.

Nick glanced back and forth from Finnick to the taco as he unwrapped it and stuck it into his mouth. It was chicken substitute: his favorite fake meat. "I'm not much on cheese, but that is not bad!" He continued to eat it.

"Well? Are you in?"

"Depends. Have you thought of a name?"

"Well, I was thinking, if we did sandwiches, too...let's just..."

"We are absolutely not naming your taco truck The Reuben Hood."

"Dang it! Great minds think alike, though, right? It was a good idea! Plus, just think about it! Me and you on the open road with a bunch of vegetables and fake meat made from vegetables and-"

"Woah, woah, woah. I have a full time job that I'm the best on the force at! You know I'd love to spend more time with you, but I need to save my money." He grabbed one of his big ears and pulled Finnick's whole body in closer, choke holding him while he had the chance. "I've got something big coming up," he whispered.