Hamilton x reader

Funny KingsBury

"Where's Y/n?"

"Alone."

" Why?! She's only a child! "

"Washington watching her."

"Why the hell would you--- dang it Seabury! You know what he could've done with her?!" I screech as he shrugged. "He seemed nice," he said softly. I only dragged him to the car with me, in a rush to get our daughter from George Washington.

>>>>>>>>>>>>•<<<<<<<<<<<<<

I walked in to see my child barging up to me. "MR.WASHINGTON SAID I WAS ADOPTED, AND THAT MEANS THAT SOMEONE SHIPPED ME OFF IN A CRATE, AND I DRIFTED INTO THE SEA, AND YOU PICKED ME UP, AND TRIED TO DROWN ME, BUT MOMMA SAVED ME, NOW TELL ME, WHY THE FUCKING HELL DID YOU MOTHERFUCKING TRY TO DROWN ME?!" my four year old shouted at me. "Princess, who taught you how to speak like that?" I ask, picking her up and hoisting her on my side. "Mr.Washington did." she grinned. "GEORGE WASHINGTON YOU CARE YOU TEACH MY DAUGHTER TO SPEAK SO FOUL!" I yelled. Only an Alexander approached from my kitchen. "I'm not George, George." he said. " WASHINGTON! "Y/n giggled, stretching her hands out to him. "Lovely darling, I'm not George, you knocked him unconscious with your cane and called him, "Name Stealer"." Alexander sighed.
"I knew she would be too young to have a cane! But that is SCANDALOUS!" Samuel sang, sweeping the baby from my hands. "FUCK HIM!" Y/n shouted as Alexander snickered. "I taught her every shout she knows." he chuckled. "Oh, god." a groan sounded. "Name stealer die." Y/n stated darkly as Seabury gasped. "No! No die!" he said. Y/n pointed at Washington, nodding.

"Name stealer die!"

" Little one, I'm not a name stealer. "Washington sighed. "Mmmmm...." Y/n hesitated, but not for long. "NAME STEALER DIE IN DITCH!" she shouted, raising her cane. "GOD PLEASE NO! SPARE ME!" George shouted, running. "DIEEEE!"Y/n screamed so hard I feared for my own life. "Washington, take cane."she tossed the cane to Alexander, who caught it. "BEAT ASS!"she cheered. "But lovely darling, he's my boss."Alexander sighed. "Me no care."she stated promptly. "Beat ass, quickly."she said. "What sorcery are the two of you teaching my child?!"I screeched. "Proper English!"Alexander laughed before walking away. "Mommy, I want to see Washington beat ass."Y/n laughed. Samuel only walked, following Alexander, ad I follow aswell.

"Son, What are you doing with her cane?"Washington asked. "I'm notcha son."he answers. "Watch you tone—"

"But I'm not your son. Just sayin', I ain't your son."

"S—"

"Call me son one more time, or so help me."

"I believe it's, put that thing, back where it came from, or so help me."Washington corrected sternly, his eyes darkened as all of us let out a whimper matching Y/n's. Alexander handed Y/n her cane, and Samuel set Y/n down, and simply walked into the bathroom. "Child, put it down—"

"SCARY BASTARD! You made my mommy cry."she said quietly, upset as ever. She raised the cane as Alexander and I watched in fear. "Say sowwy, or so help me, I'll tear you apart into 1800 pieces, and leave Jeff and Mads to go put it together like a puzzle."she said.

I've never heard a threat like that a day in my life.

Samuel came back, his eyes red and puffy. "Puzzle? You want to put together a puzzle?"he asked. "I'm going to make a puzzle, if Mr.Name Stealer doesn't say sowwy."Y/n smiled brightly. "Now say sowwy!"Y/n snapped and turned to glare at Washington. "Sorry."Washington grumbled.