Lola

31

"She started downing it like it was water. I didn't stop her. I wanted her to forget. But the alcohol was just making her angry again. She started yelling at me. She said she couldn't believe she ever loved me, and she said she was going to ruin me. She said she was sick of doing things she hated for me, and she had other friends who would love her for who she was. She was so angry, she'd gotten up and was pacing around. And then...

Dani's voice trembles. "And then?"

Caitlyn slides off the log and starts convulsing and heaving on the ground. Dani places a gentle hand on her shoulder, and I have to admit that she has a lot more empathy than I do in this situation. I look down at Caitlyn with a horrible feeling in the pit of my stomach. "Tell me."

She looks up at me, her eyes watery an pathetic. "I just wanted her to shut up. I was scared and I was angry. I pushed her. That's all I did. I just pushed her. I know I shouldn't have but that's all it was. I just pushed her and she was so drunk and she fell backwards and I didn't mean for any of this to happen."

Caitlyn's distraught rambling is almost incoherent at this point. I move closer. "So you pushed her and she fell backwards because she was drunk?"

She nods.

This doesn't make sense. "So she fell backwards - then what? That doesn't explain how she ended up driving herself off a pier."

"You don't understand. That was it. She fell backwards and there were rocks behind her. She hit her head on the rocks and that was it. She died. I killed her."

I am numb. Dani starts crying softly. "I don't understand. This doesn't make any sense. They found her in the ocean."

Caitlyn shakes her head and her eyes go wide with fear. "I didn't know what to do. I didn't want to go to jail. I didn't mean to kill her, but I knew nobody would believe me. I went back home and got some cleaning supplies. I cleaned her blood off the rocks. I knew I had to do something about the body. I couldn't go to jail, I couldn't. I'm training to swim in the Olympics. I'm a top student. I have so much to do. I knew they'd somehow find my DNA on her if they found the body, so I had to throw them off. And I had to wash off the evidence somehow."

I feel sick. I imagine Caitlyn standing over Lola's dead body, planning how she was going to hide it. She continues.

"That's when it hit me. I knew what I had to do. I picked up her body and carried her back to where her car was parked on the street. It was so dark. Nobody was awake to see me. It must have been about 2 in the morning. I put her in the passenger seat and went and took the old rope ladder from my cubby house. I put everything she brought with her in the backseat, and took the wheel. Her keys were in her pocket, she never went anywhere without them. That car was her most prized possession.

"I drove her to the esplanade, and fortunately it was empty. I parked the car and walked down the pier. I tied the rope ladder to the end of the pier so it hung down into the water. Then, I just had to drive her a little further. I got back in the car and started it again. I drove down the pier and set my course for the ocean. I wound down the windows so I could escape when we hit the water. I'm a strong swimmer, I knew I could do it. And nobody would question a girl winding down her windows to let the water in if they thought she was attempting suicide."

I taste acid in the back of my throat. My stomach lurches and before I know it I'm vomiting onto the grass. My vision blurs. This can't be real. Caitlyn doesn't stop.

"I drove her down the pier and closed my eyes as we crossed over the edge. The water rushed into the car like a tsunami and I took in the biggest breath I could manage. I pulled Lola to the driver's side of the car and swam out the window. I made it to the surface, gasping for breath and climbed up the rope ladder. I watched Lola and her car sink into the water and said goodbye. I untied the rope ladder and walked home to take a shower. It was freezing.