Through Blue Sparkly Eyes

His Doorstep

                        🗝Smiley?🗝
The ultimatum text had stricken him out of his stupid-ass-self-imposed assignment to stay away from him. The drawings had been the prelude.
Keeping an eye on him from a distance to slip a note and somewhat remain in contact was no longer an option, neither was it what he wanted.

He had lost determination and could hardly understand himself for shutting him off. It did hurt and a lot when he had said those words, but it had also become clear to him that he was talking about his experience with his mother not about him for he simply didn't know, but still, it had made the future look dark in regards of what, at that moment foreshadowed nothing but rejection from the boys side.
As the days painfully went by he started to realize he knew nothing about how things had gone on that matter. Little did he know about what the boy he missed so much had gone through to make him state such thing. "His life was better without mentally ill people around him", but, he was talking about his mother, it was a shield, a defence barrier he created to make things more tolerable, he could now understand that. And it was then when Even felt guilty for making things about him. He immediately felt a sting of regret in his stomach, he had ruined the best thing he had at the moment out of what he felt had been an act of sheer selfishness. And now the boy wouldn't shine for him as he used to, making his day brighter. He hadn't been able to shake him off his thoughts but he didn't seem to find the courage to reach out to him directly; especially after he had left him in the middle of saying something to lighten things up the other day at the cantina.

Only he could get him to act on it. Regardless of the coldness of his text it was all it took for Even to run to him.

Again, ever since he had broken contact with the boy, he hadn't been able to take him off his mind. Involuntary reminders of the most random things; his gapped teeth and how he found them an irresistible trait; how he would blush all the time and look down, whenever he had a gesture towards him, even though he was aware of his own boldness, but still, it wouldn't cease to amaze him.

He had observed him for a long time before he decided to make a move and he knew he wasn't the shy kind, it was the way he reacted to him an him alone, it was their thing, and Even cherished it, making the boy his.
And then he would finally look at him without averting his eyes, expecting him to kiss him or blissing him with his own kisses, making Even his.

So many things, that made him miss him so much, as stated on the last drawing he had slipped in his locker.
Or the previous one he had left on his jacket during PE, which had gotten him a text from the boy the next day. He couldn't stop thinking about him and he didn't even want to anymore.
On the way to his house, his mind would not stop flashing images of him; an imprint of his warmness when he was close to him, the slight touch of his lips and the impact it had on him, of how good it felt and how much he had been aching for it. Making Even a bit dizzy, they wouldn't let him concentrate to make an excuse or prepare something to say, he needed to say something, didn't he?
He was relieved though, firstly for receiving that text, which meant the boy did at least care enough to ask him to stop if he was not to take him seriously; and then, there was the chance he felt the boy had given him of making things right, and he would. No more contemplating what could go wrong in order to prevent it, but just let it flow as he so much wanted it to.

Now getting closer to his doorstep he felt nervous, nauseated even.
He was taking his time answering the door, the wait felt like torture. Was he still there? Was he taking a shower? What the hell was taking him so long? Was he doing it on purpose? He probably saw him through the window and wasn't going to answer the door. He felt a sting through his chest, he was scared.

-Blank-

He'd gone totally blank after the boy opened the door.
His "hi" was still a cold one. But seeing him and having him saying at least that, was better than nothing at all.
No teeth in sight for he was definitely not smiling, gosh they where so cute! Really? Now at this moment was he drifting for that train of thought? He discarded that one (1) brain cell that had taken his own multiple ones hostage, sent it all the way back through to the boys it belonged to* and kept acting cool. He was naturally good at it, so it was all he managed to do really, that didn't require any conscious actions. It was not like him to be at loss for words, he thought that was exclusive for him then, making it their thing also.

He should probably say som-

W/N
*of parallels ❤