Chapter 9

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Even after Juice's passing the world around her kept crumbling down. Death had claimed Charming – it had done that a long time ago, but this time its blood lust was unstoppable. That it had been SAMCRO who had lured all evil to this place, was proven by the fact that more people had died those last days. Bobby. Gemma. Unser. All ties were cut off.

All the more reason to leave this place. Nobody tried to stop her – there was just nobody left to care about her. Almost nobody. 

Her father put two boxes on top of each other to create more space in the living room and briefly looked at her. He wanted her to leave too, he wanted her far away from this place. Even though she wanted to leave as well, it hurt. She wished that he had wanted to keep her close, that he admitted that he needed her but he pushed her away like he had pushed away his other daughter.

"Ye sure ye wanna pack all this shite today?" he asked.

Abigail shrugged. "We'll see how far we get."

She wanted to stay busy, if not she would be buried under pain again. In three hour she would pick up Juice's sister and mother from the airport and she wanted to be strong for the two women. She had met his sister only once; his mother she had never seen at all. Juice had always been too afraid to reach out to her, too ashamed for what he had done. Many times she had told him that a mother's love was infinite, but she had never been able to convince him. And now it was too late.

"I'll go to the bedroom," she muttered.

Being around her father was still hard; she couldn't help blaming him for Juice's dead. He had failed as a brother, they all had, by pushing Juice to the edge until he had fallen down. However, tolerating her father's presence was still better than being alone, being remembered to all the friends she had lost. Oh, how she craved for a hug from Opie, or a pep talk from Gem. But they were gone – they all were. It was only a matter of time before her father met the same fate and it was better if she already tried to make peace with the inevitable.

Carrying an empty box to the bedroom, she opened one of the drawers next to Juice's side of the bed. She took out the car magazines and comics he used to read when she was absorbed in a book and put them carefully in the box. All his stuff would go with her; she would sort it out later. She closed the drawer again and frowned as she heard something move. She opened it again and moved her hand to the farthest corner where her fingers stumbled upon a small, velvet box. She pulled back her arm. A shiver crept down her spine as she stared at the jewelry box in her hand.

"Oh God..." she whispered. Her legs were shaking and she flopped down on the bed. Even before she opened the box, tears were streaming down her cheeks. Could it really be?

Sobs escaped her lips as she saw the elegant ring; there was a split shank and a silver halo around countless little diamonds, brought together in the form of a rose, showing clear similarities with the tattoo on her shoulder.

"Oh Juice..." she whispered. "I had no idea..."

Closing her eyes, she tried to control her breathing. It was impossible. Bending over she allowed the tears, she cried and cried, feeling so lost she just wished the tears would drown her.

It didn't take long before her father caught her sobs. Footsteps came closer and he sat down next to her, pulling her in his arms. This time she didn't push him away; she had a feeling she would just collapse if nobody held her.

"He – he wanted to propose me," she sobbed. "He wanted to marry me."

"I'm sorry my love," her father said, rocking her in his arms. "He loved ye. He..."

His phone interrupted him. Sighing, he took the call.

"Aye?" He was silent for a while, after which he let out another sigh. "Got it." He tucked the phone away. "I'm sorry lass." He rubbed her back. "Gotta go now."

"Of course you do," she said embittered. "Your club shit is undoubtedly more important than your mourning daughter."

"Abby..." he sighed. "Ye know tha's not true. I'll be back as soon as I can. It's just... the club is thinned out."

"Well maybe it's time to shut the place down," she answered coldly.

"It's our life."

"It's no life! Everyone dies! Damn, are you blind?!"

He stood up, shaking his head. "I'm sorry Abby. I wouldn't leave if it wasn't important. Jax went M.I.A. The longer we wait, the harder it is to pick up his trail."

"Don't waste your time," she huffed. "He's just the next in line to meet the Reaper. Maybe you should already arrange your own funeral, cause I can't do it again."

She bent her head, her thumb stroking the diamonds in the ring. Her father left in silence, his boots landing heavy on the floor. Her hand was shaking as she shoved the jewel around her finger.

There was no one to show it to, no one to tell.

She was alone.

Not even Scarlett was around to offer her a shoulder to cry on.

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