In a Split Second || BTS

Chapter 24

"Are you certain?"

"Mm-hmm." Her eyes finally meet mine, and I feel my heart pattering out of my chest. "I couldn't be better. Is everything all right with you?" A content smile has formed on her lips, and I find it an automatic response to smile brightly back.

Okay, okay, Hobi, you can do this.

"Yeah."

Yeah? Yeah? That's the best I can do?

"That's good." She seems unsure of where to carry the conversation after that, so a few moments of uncomfortable silence pass between us.

"Oh, for the love of God," someone groans from around the corner. We both glance in that direction and see Eun Jung's head peeking out from behind a wall. "Just kiss already, will you?"

"Eun Jung-ah!" Cherisse gasps.

"I'm serious! Are you going to keep staring awkwardly at each other or say something substantial?"

This is it – this is my chance.

"Good point," I reply. "Cherisse, the other members and I were talking, and we decided we would like to stay in Japan for a few more days and sightsee. They want to go to Kyoto, but I was wondering if you would be interested in visiting Tokyo with me?"

Her jaw slacks slightly, and a pink blush rushes over her cheeks. A squeal sounds from down the hallway. "Cherisse, say yes!" Cherisse's eyes flicker towards Eun Jung's excited countenance and then back to my hopeful smile. She giggles and looks down, but just as quickly reinstates eye contact.

"I would love to go to Tokyo with you."

"Y-you would?"

"Yes, she would! Now, kiss!" Eun Jung calls.

My heart threatens to pound out of my chest at the thought of kissing her, but I manage to force an easygoing smile on my face and shrug my shoulders at Cherisse. "The public has spoken." I take a step closer and, to my surprise, she doesn't move even an inch backward. She is completely frozen in place, but I can feel her warm breath fogging at my lips. My chest pangs and my hands ache to reach out and hold her, but I restrain all of my emotions and summon just enough courage to brush my lips against her cheek lightly. Her skin is so warm and soft that it makes me want to linger, but I pull back and tuck my hands into my pockets to hide their shaking. She looks into my eyes with breathless desire, and I almost lean forward to kiss her again. Then, Eun Jung squeaks, and it breaks the tension of the moment.

"One of these days," Cherisse mumbles quietly, a small smile gracing her lips.

I laugh and reach out to squeeze her hand once. She visibly tenses at the gesture but relaxes the moment I pull away. Her gaze follows me down the hall. The moment I turn the corner, I lean against the wall and breathe out a long sigh of relief. I don't know that I have been so afraid to speak to anyone in my life. Well, except for the time the members voted me in as the tribute to wake up Yoongi-hyung. I learned the true meaning of fear that day.

I don't know what I was afraid of – did I fear that she would reject me? Even if she had, it wouldn't have prohibited me from confessing my true feelings.

As before, my heart patters in my chest and a nervous smile rises to my lips. I have to remember that this was only one step on a long road – I plan to confess to her in Tokyo, but there are many more steps we have to take after that, if our relationship makes it that far. I pray it does. Someday, God willing, I want to propose to her and get married in a church near my hometown. I want to have children with her and watch them grow up to have my enthusiasm for life and her unparalleled goodness. I want to grow old with her and make promises that we will always keep. I want a life with her that I haven't wanted with anyone else – this is more than a desire for romance. This is a desire for her.