Always | ✓

24. Soup

Yesterday was not fun.

After witnessing what I did, I was a bit of a mess.

It's always easy to think you're okay and you're fine, but if you're not actually, then it only take a little nudge for everything to come crumbling down.

All your guards, defences that you've tried to put up, they come down immediately and it hurts.

I honestly didn't think seeing that would be this hard, but it was. It was like a blow to my entire system. Unexpected.

After I had bumped into Danny, he immediately put me in the passenger seat of his car and drove me home.

It was so silent. Throughout the journey he didn't say anything nor did he ask me for a reason. He just said nothing, but his silence and unanswered questions were so loud.

I knew that I couldn't just bullshit him. I couldn't lie. I couldn't just tell him that I was fine and hope that he'd believe it.

Danny knew me and never once had he seen me so...shaken. Because I truly was.

It was like the foundation that I stood on had been rocked and I was so terrified of falling. Even if I already had.

Once we'd reached my home, I could see that Danny wanted to ask but he was waiting for me.

I only took a moment and I spilled out my secret to him.

To be completely honest, I wasn't going to tell him everything. I thought I would just be vague, mention that I had a crush and I just saw him with someone else, but the second I opened my mouth, I just kept on telling him the truth.

It was like this secret was just begging to come out, no longer satisfied with it just being kept buried within me. It had to be told.

If I didn't have it within me to tell the person who probably had to hear it, then telling someone else I trusted would have to suffice.

As I told Danny everything, from the first time I met Liam, till what I had just seen, a range of emotions seemed to have come across his face.

It was painfully awkward to tell him all of this, but once I started, I couldn't stop.

What actually surprised me, was that Danny didn't seem shocked at all by my confession. He looked like he sort of expected me to say all of this. I didn't know what to think about that, but I kind of appreciated he didn't seem so react much. It oddly made me feel a little better.

There was no judgement from him. Nothing to suggest he was disappointed and more importantly, there was no pity.

Apparently, he saw the signs, even though I didn't realise I was giving off any.

After telling him, I felt as if I'd just lifted a rock off my chest. It felt a bit more freeing and I could actually breathe. I wasn't carrying the weight of it all alone anymore.

When Danny hugged me after it all, I smiled.

He didn't tell me to get over it, or it's just a crush, you'll move on. He didn't say anything, which was expected since it was Danny, but it was that kind of silence that was still comforting. I knew what he would've said and that he was there for me, that was enough.

Of course, there was some repercussions of just ditching school in the middle of the day.

My parents got a call that I hadn't turned up to my lessons in the afternoon, which caused them to panic immediately and call me.

I had to lie and tell them that I felt really ill after lunch and Danny had to bring me home.

I never skipped school like this, or just leave in the middle of the day without them knowing, so they believed me.