MARCSELLA | MM93

Chapter 34 | Back To You

My feet dragged me to the balcony and sat there. Let the night air refresh my mind. I plugged the earphone to my phone and wore them. My thumb scrolling down to the playlist until it landed on Coldplay – The Scientist. I played the song and thought about Marc. Does he still love me? after what I had done to him?

Come up to meet you

Tell you I'm sorry

You don't know how lovely you are

I had to find you

Tell you I need you

Tell you I set you apart

Tears streamed down on my face. Just a thought of him made my heart ached. I almost jolted when Jonathan sat beside me, came out of nowhere. I quickly wiped the tears away. Jonathan sighed, "Hi, Marsella."

I know that nickname. The serious one. He always called me Marsella when he wanted to talk something serious.

"I'm sorry," I apologized, sobbing in his embrace. I hadn't been the best sister ever since Marcell died, and this year was the worst. I kept everything from my family. I rarely called them when I was away. My heart still aching as I sobbing inside his bear hug.

He stroked my hair softly, and let me cried, "shh, it's okay."

I tried to stop the tears, and maintain to calm myself. After about thirty minutes, I stopped crying. He gave me his water bottle and I drank from it.

"I haven't been a better person this past one year. I'm sorry if you feel forgotten or unwanted. I barely tell anything that happened to me,"

He sighed, "pathetic, I know." He made a sarcastic remark over himself, "I assumed you didn't need me anymore. or I am not as good as Marcell."

"Assumed as in the past not assume," he explained with his hand gesture, made me giggle a little. "no, you're the best big brother God has ever sent me."

"I'm the only big brother you have," Jonathan rolled his eyes in annoyance. "But it still counts."

"So, since you stepped your feet on my house all of the sudden, I know something was wrong. But you just kept it inside. What happened?"

"You know every moment I had with him were hilarious and funny to remember. We barely fight until the night before I flight to London. I might slip out the dare and he looked disappointed and that was when I know I've gone too far." I told him everything that happened that day.

"That night, all the guilt came back. I felt so hopeless. I messed everything up. I still got nightmares, panic attack. Once in a month he came to my dreams."

I looked him in the eyes, "And you know what's worse? That night, when I fell asleep. I had a nightmare. I was brought back then right after the accident when I yelled at you. When I found out he didn't survive. And when I saw the scars and blood stains all over his body."

I was shaking. He hugged me, "I know you're a strong fighter, Sel."

"I hope so," I said. "You are. I'm telling you the truth, and I think you need to sort things out with Marc. I really hoped you guys get back together. You were happier with him."

"I know but I need to see him in person," I said but deep down inside, I'm afraid if he wouldn't talk to me, "I'll flight back to Cervera this Friday."

"You want me to come with you?" he asked, "no, I need to fix this myself. Besides, you need to rest. You still in your recovery."

He nodded, "I hoped you the best. Now just get some sleep."

I hugged him once again before walking towards my old room and sleep.

**

"Marsella, Marsella—wake up!" a familiar voice I know woke me up from my sleep. I opened my eyes and saw him. He's here. I quickly sat on my bed and looked at him, afraid if I was visited by a ghost.

"Aw come on Sel, don't make that look. I'm here for a chat." Marcell said to me. He didn't change a bit except his scars were way soften.

"Am I dreaming?" I asked him

"Yes," he simply said. "but I just woken up."

He laughed, "you were sleeping in your dream. Then I woke you up."

"So I'm actualy sleeping right now?" I stupidly asked. He nodded, "in real life, yes."

"Alright, what you want to talk about?"

"Your boyfriend," he started. Not again, ugh. I rolled my eyes, "he wasn't anymore."

"You're hurting and I hate seeing you like this," He said, sitting on my desk.

She nodded, "I'll go talk to him."

And with that, Marcell smiled at her before disappeared.

Thank You!

Kiarine❤💙