Nick & Bailey

55. Bailey

He stops again, losing his breath, when I push my pelvis even deeper onto his erection. "Stop. Bailey." His tone is more desperate now, and I halt my movements. "If we don't stop right now, I'm not going to be able to."

I straighten my arms, lifting my chest off of his. "Do you not want me, Nick? I won't force you." I bring my mouth back to his neck, "But just know that I want you more than I've ever wanted anything, ever. I want you inside me. I want you all over me. I want you moaning my name as you come. I want everything you have to give."

Before I have time to process what is happening, Nick has flipped us over, thrown his clothes off, and is standing next to the bed, rolling on a condom. "Were you expecting to use one of those tonight?" I ask, smirking.

He shrugs. "I always have one, just in case." But he doesn't meet my eyes. I wonder how many times he's needed one in the last four months.

He's on top of me once again, kissing my cheeks, and my jaw bone, and my chin—everywhere but my mouth. He's taking his time, relishing the moment. When his parted lips do finally meet mine, we kiss slowly, and deeply, and generously. I think I hear him humming, but it's difficult to hear anything over my beating heart.

He spreads my legs with his and enters me slowly. We have to break the kiss as I gasp for air, overwhelmed by what I'm feeling. He is so large, I feel like I might rip in two. He looks into my eyes, searching. What he is searching for, I couldn't guess. I've never been this content in my life.

As he moves in and out of me, he doesn't take his eyes from mine. He is unhurried, still taking his time. Making sure he fills me completely with each thrust and watching how I respond when he does.

This is like nothing I've ever experienced. In the past, I'd had sex with my body. With Nick, it's more than that.

More of everything. More of my heart, more of my soul, more of my mind, more of me and more of him. Just...more.

The tension is too much and I bring my mouth back to his, wrapping my tongue gently around his as he continues his slow, taunting pace.

Our bodies eventually take over and we quicken our speed, needing to find that release together. He rests his head on the pillow next to mine, keeping our bodies connected from shoulders to hips. The sound of his panting next to my ear is practically euphoric.

Digging my fingers into his back, I yell his name as a fire courses through me, unraveling me. This is a pleasure like I've never known. Even with all the orgasms he's given me, they don't compare to how it feels while he's inside me.

"Bailey." It's more of an exhale than actual words as he comes, and I can practically feel him falling apart as he rests on top of me. His lungs—and mine—are working overtime. "That was...unbelievable."

He rolls off of me and removes the condom. He is able to place it back into the wrapper and throw into my waste basket with ease. "I'll take that out later," he says as he lies back down. We don't want my parents seeing it.

I curl into him, resting my head on his chest and draping an arm over his stomach. As he places his hand on my back, I can feel that it's shaking. "Nick, are you okay?" I look up to him.

He's staring up at nothing, smiling. "Yes."

I leave it alone, and he seems to calm himself after a minute or two. He rolls onto his side and raises me up to his level, so we are face to face before kissing me softly. "Thank you," I whisper.

He kisses me again with a groan. "I told you to stop saying that."

I giggle and kiss him. When I pull away, he places his hand on my face, running his thumb along my cheekbone. I could lie here forever, alternating between staring into his brown eyes and kissing his full lips. Fate has other plans, though.

My phone's text alert chimes on the desk behind me. My first instinct is to ignore it and not ruin this moment. But then I remember the tragedy that took place today, and sigh as I roll over to reach for it, reading Ian's message quickly.

When I turn back to Nick, he hasn't moved. "Ian and my mom are on their way home. My dad's staying with my grandma."

"Should I go?"

"If your door is closed, they will just assume we are both asleep, separately."

He nods but looks unsure. "Nick, I don't want you to go."

His eyes soften. "I don't want to either."

That settles it. Nick rests his hand on my hip. "So what is your grandma going to do? Where will she live?"

I thought I wouldn't want to talk about it, but with Nick, I feel safe. He fulfilled his promise, I'm not in pain anymore. "I'm not sure. I could see her moving in with her friends at the assisted living place. She was kind of talking about that even before this. She'll probably move in here first, though."

"I guess that means I'm back on Ian's floor."

"I'm sorry."

"No. I didn't mean it like that. I'll move wherever she needs me to. She has more of a right to be here than I do. It will just be hard for you and I to be alone." He quickly looks away like he's embarrassed. "If you'd even want to."

I hate that he is so self-deprecating. I tilt his face so he's forced to look at me again. "Hell yes I'd want to."

He laughs and pulls me into his chest, kissing the top of my head. I feel one of his legs rest between mine. It's hard to believe that I woke up this morning with a boyfriend, who I had no intention of breaking up with—I even started birth control to use with him—and am now single, sharing this incredibly intimate moment with someone else.

Evan wasn't thrilled when I told him it was over, but it could have been worse.

"Is there someone else?" He had asked.

"No, Evan, this just isn't working for me anymore." I didn't see the point in telling him the truth. It wouldn't change anything. This relationship had never been fair to Evan, from day one. There was just a part of me that he would never have. It belonged to someone else. He deserved to find someone better.

"What did I do wrong?" Evan sounded like he was trying not to break.

"Nothing! I mean it. You did nothing wrong. This is me, all me."

I could tell he had more to say, but, in true Evan fashion, he was a gentleman. "I just want you to be happy."

"I want that for you, too" I said, meaning it.

There was a long pause. "Do you still need a ride back to school after break?"

Fuck. I hadn't thought about that. "Can I let you know? I'm not sure what I'll do yet."

"Yes, of course. You can still ride with me, if you want."

I thanked him and we said goodbye. It was probably the most cordial breakup I'd ever had.

My thoughts return to the present when Nick begins trailing his hand up and down my back. "I just need to know why, Bailey."

I look up at him, confused. "Why what?"

"Why me? Why did you choose me?"

I tell him the truth. "Nick, there was never a choice to be made. It was just...you. It's always been you. Always. I just didn't know it yet."