lovers rock

thirty seven

'am i running late
i get overwhelmed
all the awful dreams
all the bright screens
is my lover there
are we breaking up
did she find someone else
and leave me alone
alone'

♩✧♪●♩○♬☆

12/5/16

"hey baby" theo kissed his girlfriend's cheek gently. he smelled of alcohol and something she couldn't quite remember the name of. "theo have you been drinking?" y/n questioned. "mhm" he hummed. he was smirking as he looked at her.

"c'mon baby you should just try some weed it'd help you relax a little" theo offered many times though y/n never gave in. she wasn't going to give in today either. it was getting to be too much. theo had been drinking, smoking cigarettes, smoking weed and probably taking other drugs. y/n was worried about him. nor was she fond of underage usage of drugs and alcohol.

he wouldnt come over as often as he used to. he'd usually be at parties too busy to visit his girlfriend. he invited her to every party he went but it was rare for y/n to accompany him, she wasn't one for parties.

"theo, you're killing yourself!" y/n grabbed his hand, trying to take the cigarette he was about to light. "so what" he responded grimly, moving his hand and putting the cancer stick delicately in his mouth.

"so what?! so you want to die, theodore this is your life we're talking about" y/n looked up at him, she knew everything that happened, she knew why his eye was purple, why his chest was painted with various shades of purple, she knew it all.

"life is a fucking game. we play it and and why not have fun! you know! why not have fun until fucking game over is all i see. just let me play the way i wanna play!" his voice was raised but yoiu

"fuck you!" he growled, she knew he didn't mean it though. his eyes were beginning to water. his leg bouncing quickly. "fuck you y/n! i-i you don't understand, you have it fucking perfect" he shouted. "you don't know what it's like you'd never understand" he didn't look at her when he shouted those things. "i may not understand everything that happening don't assume my life is perfect asshole" y/n grumbled.

"there you go again" theo sighed holding his cigarette between his fingers as he huffed out smoke. "there i go again what?" y/n spat. "it's all about you isn't! 'mY liFe's noT pErfEct' yeah at least you don't get fucking beat! at least your mom isn't an alcoholic! at least you have fucking friends! at least you don't wanna fucking die" he screamed standing up.

"you don't know anything!" she yelled back standing up as well. he laughed bitterly. he grabbed her shirt collar pulling her closer to him. "i know your life is better than mine in so many ways and you don't ever fucking appreciate because you're a fucking spoiled brat" each word was said with such venom it made y/n angry.

"don't fucking touch me" she hissed getting out if his grasp and glaring at him. "you should stop being such an asshole sometimes and actually talk to me about what's wrong. i could help you okay?" y/n muttered, she was angry but she knew he was just hurting and taking it out on her.

"oh thanks princess that's exactly what i fucking need" theo rolled his eyes putting the cigarette back in his mouth. "i'm being fucking nice!" she yelled, she bit her lip. she couldn't stand when he was like this. she grabbed the cigarette from his lips and stepped on it.

a sharp slap was heard as his hand met her face. his eyes widened in shock at what he just did, though he quickly narrowed them. "t-theo" y/n gasped her hand rubbing the now red spot on her cheek. he was so conflicted, he wanted nothing more to cry to her, apologise a million times and just tell her everything that had been going on.

but he couldn't.

"fuck you"