Taekook Oneshots

Hold On

(A/N: i had to pause from writing this and continue at a later date because of the angst within it. I'm warning you now wonders, this is genuinely heart wrenching. Trigger warning, suicide attempts and hospitals. and extreme angst.

Request from @jeonilyjh     i'm sorry the ending wasn't 100% cheerful but i did my best.

Love you wonders x)

Loving and fighting
Accusing, denying
I can't imagine a world with you gone

My heart skips a beat when I read the text. It's not possible that he's taken my words to heart, that he believes I don't love him. It was just something shouted out in the middle of an argument that shouldn't have gotten so heated, words strung out in the air that I can't hide under my shirt now that he's seen them, now that he's heard them.

Sure, I have a toxic relationship with my boyfriend. But he's the reason I'm still alive, and I can't possibly live without him. It's that simple. I'm more dependent than I care to let on, and I cannot imagine myself without him. He wouldn't leave me. He wouldn't just give up from those meaningless words, would he?

It's pointless to hope that something hasn't happened when I already know that it has.

The joy and the chaos, the demons we're made of
I'd be so lost if you left me alone

I practically throw my head into my hands, unable to comprehend the truth of what just happened. It's not possible. It's not possible. It can't be.

My phone seems to fly across the room like a bullet, hitting the wall opposite me with a painfully loud crash, landing violently on the floor and smashing. I know, before I stand up to retrieve it, that there's a dent in the plaster now, and when I pick it up, there's a crack which curves from one corner to the opposite, a spider's web of damaged glass on the screen.

"Fuck!" I exclaim, the curse half-whispered, as if a louder vocalisation will make it all true. As if it's going to change the past. But I'm no idiot. I caused this, in my own stupidity. And I have to make sure it's solved.

You locked yourself in the bathroom
Lying on the floor when I break through

"Taehyung! Please just open the door!"
"You hate me. What reason have I got to live? I shouldn't exist anyway, you've heard them say that I'm a mistake. If you don't love me, who can?"
"Tae," I say desperately, smacking my forehead harshly against the door in my panic. "I didn't mean it. Honestly. It was just words. Nothing more."

I hear a shuddering breath, and a small popping noise, like the opening of a container, and my whole world begins to swirl around me. "Tae, don't. Don't do it. Please don't do it. I'm begging you. This isn't how you need to do this. Please, don't."
"And now you say that you need me, when my life is in your hands. I can feel the pity even from here," my boyfriend says in a choked voice, and for a moment I can't even stand up properly, the panic beginning to get to me now.

I throw my entire body weight against the door, sighing in relief when the cheap material gives in maybe five or ten minutes after constant attack, allowing me to enter the bathroom. Only to see him collapse onto the floor. An open container in his hand.

I pull you in to feel your heartbeat
Can you hear me screaming "please don't leave me"

I fall to my knees beside his unconscious form, bringing his head up to rest gently in my lap, watching with horror as it lolls down with the pull of gravity. With shaking hands, I dial three familiar numbers, lifting my damaged phone to my ear.

"999, what's the emergency?" an older man's voice says calmly.
"I-I think my boyfriend just overdosed. I think he was trying - trying to end it all, if you know what I mean."
"Oh, shit. I'm calling an ambulance for you, okay?"
"T-Thank you," I say, rubbing my eyes with a hand. Then, without warning, I break into uncontrollable sobs, probably alarming the poor operator on the phone.