What you need to know

14. Relationship

Connecting with someone romantically, emotionally, and physically can be really amazing. But there's a lot of work that goes into building a good relationship.

No relationship is perfect all the time. But in a healthy relationship, both people feel good about the relationship most of the time. A great relationship takes more than attraction — it takes work, and both of you have to be willing to put in the effort.

· Love yourself. Being comfortable with who you are means you'll be a happier partner.

· Communicate. Talk to your partner about your feelings. Ask questions and listen to their answers. If you're upset, say so — don't make your partner try to figure out what's up. Talking through problems builds trust and makes your relationship stronger. And it's not all about how to deal with your problems — don't forget to let them know when something they do makes you happy.

· Be honest. Be truthful with each other about what you do, think, and feel. Honesty creates trust. Few things harm a relationship more than lies.

· Give each other some space. Couple's time is great, but spending ALL your time together isn't. It's healthy to have your own friends and interests outside of the relationship.

· Agree to disagree. You're not always going to see eye to eye, and that's OK. The important thing is to respect each other's opinions and ideas.

· Forgive and ask for forgiveness. Everybody makes mistakes. Be willing to apologize for yours — and accept your partner's apologies.

· Support each other. When your partner does something great, tell them! Your partner should do the same for you

How do I know if my relationship is healthy?

It's good to check in with yourself from time to time to see how you're feeling about your relationship. The questions below focus on romantic and sexual relationships, but they can apply to other kinds of relationships, too. After you've asked yourself these questions, it could be helpful to answer them again from your partner's perspective.

· Does your partner listen to and respect your ideas?

· Does your partner give you space to spend time with your friends and family?

· Do you have fun spending time together?

· Do you feel comfortable telling your partner when something they do upsets you?

· Do you feel comfortable sharing your thoughts and feelings?

· Does your partner make an effort to get along with your friends and family?

· Is your partner proud of your accomplishments and successes?

· Does your partner respect your differences?

Relationships can be complicated, but if you answered "yes" to all of these questions, there's a good chance you're in a healthy relationship. If you answered "no" to two or more questions, you might be in an unhealthy relationship.

How can I make my relationship better?

Keeping your relationship in great shape definitely takes work. Talk to your partner about things that you think could be better. Be clear about what's bothering you, and be respectful. Good communication is a big part of solving problems. If you have trouble working through things on your own, you might consider getting help from someone outside your relationship.

Remember if you can be naked from soul and still be happy with each other. You are in a healthy relationship. And if you have at least one thing to hide from your partner that means you are not in a healthy relationship.

To hide - you will have to lie – when lie gets caught you break the trust – without trust no relationship could survive. Don't do anything that makes you think that you would need to hide from your partner.

Truths to Keep Your Relationship Healthy

1. Successful relationships take work. They don't happen in a vacuum. They occur when the couples in them take the risk of sharing what it is that's going on in their hearts and heads.

2. You can only change yourself, not your partner. If you love someone and think that after a while he or she will alter behaviors you find uncomfortable, think again. If you want changes, put them on the table. so your partner knows what you need.

3. All arguments stem from our own fear or pain. When upset occurs, check out what's going on inside of you rather than get angry with your partner. Truth is that we usually aren't upset for the reasons we think we are. (Misunderstanding could cause unwanted problems)

4. Understand that men and women are very different. Understanding and celebrating our differences will make living together more peaceful, interesting, and fun.

5. Anger is a waste of time. Anger is also a relationship killer, because it makes you self-absorbed and won't allow you to see the good. If you are annoyed with your mate, give yourself some time to calm down and then gently discuss what's going on for you.

6. Find a way to become and stay best friends. For some this sounds unromantic, but for those who live it, most say it's the best part of their time together.

7. Give what you want to get. Our needs change with time. If you'd like to feel understood, try being more understanding. If you want to feel more love, try giving more. It's a simple program that really works.

There are no guarantees, but couples who practice these techniques have longer and stronger relationships than those who are not proactive in their love.