Invasion from the Appleverse

35. The Numbers

Reality Fb54278, Banana Republic of New Texas.

The Alamo: Present Day.

Colonel Buck Travers reloaded his colt .45 and looked over the wall. 'Them Apple sum'bitches jes keep comin' damn em ta hell.'

His most trusted officers were by his side.

All in black and with a wide brimmed stetson, was Major 'Big' Jim Banana-Bowie and in his furs and coon skin hat, the trapper and scout Davy 'Yellaskin' Crockett an them ol boys weren't nuthin ta scoff at. Ceptin o course, the bananas here at the ol Alamo wuz outgunned by at least ten ta one o them thin skinned extra-dimensional invaders.

Yellaskin said so and then spat out some chaw. 'Reckon we'll jes have ta kill us ten o them boys ta ever'one of us Colonel.'

The Banana in charge scratched at his stubble. 'Reckon so. Ah got me a score ta settle with that lowdown rattlesnake done killed ma brother Hank.'

Big Jim paused from firing his rifle over the parapet. 'That sidewinder Henri? Scuttlebut says he ain't with these here invaders, worst luck.'

Buck scowled. 'Whal, we cain't do much bout that right now, cept stay alive an show them boys Texas steel. Good news is that there ain't been more through the dimensional breach, so if'n we cn git our comms up n working reinforcements ought to show up soon.'

The Colonel's adjutant wasn't so confident. 'Seems they're messing with our orbiting sat com, but them boys in Houston ought ta figger out summat ain't right by that. Les hope we cn hold out til then.'

Buck fired, drilling an apple between the eyes. 'Whal I done killed me 8 s'far so them numbers is lookin reasonable.'

*

Dimensional Void

Voidship 'Doombringer.'

Doctor Von Applestadt stared intensely at the screens. 'Soon!' he ranted. 'Soon I shall be master of a second universe and then others shall fall before my might! Worlds without number!'

The Appleverse

The Schloss Von Apfelkuchen

Ludwig ran his long fingers over the genealogical chart. '17 Holtz! The numbers do not lie. And of those 17 only eight stand in my way.'

Holtz bowed low. 'Indeed Master and may I say that I believe it is soon to be seven. We only await the call from ... aha!'

Ludwig Von Apfelkuchen snatched up his mobile communicator. 'Ja? Ah ... sehr gut Herr Fürchten. Your fee will be wired as promised. No, stand down ... I will take great pleasure in disposing of the others ... personally.'

Holtz leaned in. 'So you are one step closer to the Barony master!'

Ludwig smiled. 'This is so Holtz. It seems my uncle the Graf Von Apfelsose accidentally fell into his acid vats while torturing a captive orange.'

'How very unfortunate for the Graf, master.'

'Indeed. It seems my family are recently in the habit of making unfortunate choices. My uncle, to step too close to the edge and dear cousin Henri wooing a possible wife. I was content Holtz to see my doddering relatives expire naturally while Henri remained a bachelor, but his recent choices and the discovery of a bastard son ... this changes and accelerates my plans!'

*

The town of Naranja, ten miles from the border of Orange territories.

Henry walked out into the courtyard to find Hubert and King Oran saddling kangaroos.

Both greeted their banana friend enthusiastically.

'Henry!' called the King. 'Orange Intelligence have been looking at the numbers and we believe our agent has found the correct frequency to contact the resistance in the area near Applestadt. If the contact goes well we can start planning on smuggling you and Hubert across the border.'

Henry gulped. He knew what he had to do, but the thought terrified him!

*

The Schloss Von Applestadt

Henri turned in his sleep and smiled. Life was good.

*

Reality Prime. Fruitverse Subsection - Pineapple Homeworld.

The Grand Pineapple looked at the numbers again. 'This is worrying. The numbers don't look good.'

His aide punched up the screen. 'But at least we have an idea where Doctor Von Applestadt is heading and three contingency plans are in place. We just heard from Hubert and things are progressing on that front.'

The leader of the council of extra-dimensional fruit, guardians of the entire run of realities in this sector of the multiverse, was not so sure. 'Yes, but so much depends on a loose cannon like Henri. He is almost as unpredictable as the Doctor.'

The assistant swiped his tablet. 'Well Eggbert is in place. We activated a sub stream burst to his comms to alert him the time has come. Hopefully he can counter Henri in time. As for the Doctor, I managed to get a line on his arch enemy from his native reality, one Red Applechards.'

'Have we spoken to Doctor Applechard yet?'

'No, he's busy with some kind of space launch but his associate Sue Strawberry assured me she would pass on the message after their mission.'

The Grand Pineapple looked grim. 'That won't be enough. As invaluable as Doctor Applechards' advice would be, we need him to take an active hand against Von Applestadt and to that he must be ... empowered.'

The aide looked shocked. 'You don't mean!'

'Yes. I intend to divert that flight and make it appear the Doctor sabotaged it. The right sort of cosmic storm should do the trick.'