Tainted

Chapter Thirty-Four

I can hear Rogue laughing uproariously throughout dinner, but every time I turn toward him, he looks away.

I've only been half listening to the conversation around me. I'm sitting between Sailor and Posy, picking half-heartedly at the sandwich I chose at random.

"What's up?" Tanymede asks. She doesn't seem to be having any trouble with her appetite.

"You're wearing me out in training," I say, forcing a smile.

Tanymede looks shrewdly at me, but let's my answer pass.

"So, Prof, what's the story for this evening?' Tanymede asks.

Prof is sitting on the other side of Ceryl, a bowl of roast vegetables and rice before him.

"You want me to start the story sharing?" he asks, looking a bit surprised.

Tanymede chews her bite and swallows. "Yes," she says. "You talk about stories all day long, how is this going to be any different."

Prof leans back in his chair. "It's not 'stories' that I'm sharing with the kids, it's actual history and educational—"

"Smudge," Tanymede says. She gnaws at a drumstick with her teeth.

Prof licks his lips. He visibly looks like he's trying to restrain himself. "Some of the things I talk about during the day are important and developmental. I'm trying to shape these kids' world views."

"By educating them on the world view of the winners." Tanymede sets down the clean bone of her drumstick. She places a few spoonfuls of rice on a plate and pushing it toward Vates. He doesn't move.

"What do you mean?" Prof asks. He adjusts his spectacles over his ears.

"You're sharing the world view from the perspective of Choravasi. What about other kingdoms/countries? Like Anglia, for instance?"

I tune out their conversation. It's one they've had before, but Tanymede can't seem to let it go.

My eyes drift over to Rogue. He's sitting at a table with Dem and Sani. I recognize a few other people from his war tent meeting seated there as well.

Rogue takes a sip from his mug, and his eyes dart over to mine.

We make eye contact for the briefest of seconds, before Rogue drops his gaze back to the table.

I tear up a corner of my sandwich in little pieces. I don't know what I've done wrong. It seemed like he was the one opening up, and he was the one who leaned in for a kiss. I don't know why he's ignoring me now, and I don't know how to fix it.

"Are yae alrigh'?" Sailor asks quietly.

"I don't feel great," I say. I pick up my plate. "I think I'm going to take this to the tent. I'm sorry for leaving early."

Everyone at the table bids me goodbye and says they hope I feel well.

As I step away from the table, I feel a tug on the bottom of my tunic. I look down to see Axos, her curly hair tied up in two buns at the top of her head like ears. She's wearing the purple skirt.

She smiles toothily at me. "I love it," she says, twirling so the skirt swishes around her legs.

A warm bubble builds in my gut. "I'm glad," I say, and she skips off, back to join her father at the dining table.

I move further away, thinking I can feel Rogue's eyes on my back, but when I turn to look, he's speaking with the female Elch next to him, and I wonder if he even knows I'm leaving.