outlines ✰ l.h.

chapter twenty-eight

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"Get out," Luke growled, climbing off of me.

I sat up on the bed, my head spinning. My heart pounding.

"Luke, listen. It didn't mean any-"

"I said get the fuck out." His voice raised at me as he interrupted me. He yanked the door open, waiting for me to leave. I didn't want to.

"I'm not leaving!" I shouted back at him. He lunged out at grabbed my wrist, forcing me through the doorway. "You're hurting me," I whimpered, turning to him and staring into his eyes.

His grip loosened, his nostrils still flaring. He let go of my wrist and got one last look at me before slamming the door in my face. I heard a subtle "click" of the lock and pressed my back against the white wooden door.

I sat down on the ground, breaking into sobs with my arms wrapped around my head. Dozens of people floated up and down the hallway and the music seemed to only get louder. No one bothered to check, no one bothered to ask. Then again, it wasn't anyone's obligation.

You know when you watched a rom-com and the first scene zooms from a beautiful woman's face to a Times Square crowd around her rushing by? This felt like that cinematic moment. But there was no comedy, and there was no more romance.

-

Finals were here. Three weeks since my tragic heart break. But it wasn't all about me.

That was a fault of mine, thinking only of myself. I couldn't help it for I was human and could only physically feel my emotions and not others. Nobody could. But I was slowly recognizing that this heartbreak wasn't owned by me. It was owned by Luke. And I sold him the devastation.

I sat in third period, furiously texting Ashton for the answers for my exam. He wasn't responding, I hadn't studied. I had never been good at science anyways. All I wanted was a C, but I was slowing recognizing that I was getting an F. Maybe a G.

"Emerson." My eyes jolted up to the man in his early 30s, who had his hand out ready to take my device.

"I was just texting my dad." Lying through my teeth was something I was getting better at.

"I'm sure," he whispered back to me. I sunk into my uncomfortable desk, handing over my cell. I picked up my pencil and he snatched the bubble sheet from my desk. "In school suspension is where you'll be for the rest of the day."

My heart sunk. It's what I got for breaking the school's policy-no phones during exams. But in my defense, I also needed to pass my class and the last few weeks my grade point average has seen better days.

Embarrassment flooded into every part of me. It was like I was struck by lightning and the electric jolts were branching out throughout my body. Anxiety rumbled through my bones. My cheeks were as red as the clay that students tracked through the school.

I approached the familiar hallway. It was silent and empty. Just like how the ISS room was going to be. I knew that.

I quietly entered the room and was greeted kindly by the teacher I hadn't seen in about a month and a half.

"Andy Emerson," he called to me. I forced a kind smile back at him and handed him my suspension sheet.

I gripped tightly on my backpack as he scribbled his signature on the flimsy paper. He then handed me a standard folder of work to do. A packet of work I've done a dozen times. I turned around and spotted the corner I always sat in. Along with the boy who I first met here.

Luke was already looking up at me, a clenched jaw and narrowed eyes. He seemed happy to see me. His stare was heavy on me as I approached his aisle, then it diverted once I took my seat.

I didn't bother to say a word to him for the rest of the day. I had said too much to him already, done too much. Shutting up was the best option for me. I couldn't help but glance up at him every few minutes, though. I wondered what he did in his time away from me. I wondered if he thought about me, too. I wondered if he still cared about me, too.

The rest of the day was glances and excuses to go to the bathroom. My packet was full of doodles and unanswered questions. Luke worked meticulously on math work from a class I hadn't taken yet.

The last bell tang, releasing us from the classroom. Luke had his things packed and ready, and I hurried to get mine together. I felt the need to talk to him, and now I was chasing him. He wound through the hallways quickly and swam through the crowd of teenagers with ease. It was like he was a fish and I was the shark. Except I didn't want to hurt him anymore.

I didn't know what I'd say to him this time. I rehearsed it for a couple weeks after the incident and then after that I gave up. I felt no words were acceptable for him anymore. And I deserved that.

It felt like maybe I was trying to talk to a brick wall. But I also didn't know what he was feeling. Luke didn't seem to feel too much anyways. Perhaps I was overthinking and putting too much thought into this. Or maybe not enough.

We exited the building and were heading towards the parking lot.

"Luke," I called out. I knew he could hear me. I picked up my speed and tried to get closer to him.

"Luke!" I shouted again. He gave me a glare over his shoulder, not one I thought was silly or annoying. One that stabbed my through the chest.

He pulled his car keys from his pockets and unlocked his car as we approached it. The humidity was making it hard to breathe. Or maybe knowing this could be the last time I see him for the summer was making it hard.

I stopped in my tracks as he sat in his car. He locked eyes with me as he shut his car door. He reversed quickly and sped off. I was left in the dust of the gravel lot only to take in his stoic profile as he left the school grounds.

I remember being 16, angrily speeding away from my dad who wouldn't let me miss a week of school to go the beach with my friend. But I came back home and I cried in his arms about a missed vacation and for being so rude to him. This case was much different, but our reactions were the same. We had lost control over something we thought we had.

I had lost Luke.

-

A/N:

hi short update!!!! angry luke is angry

sorry for taking over a week to update my brain has been fried

how r we liking outlines so far...do u hate me yet