CAPTURE THIS (Updating regularly)

Chapter 27

She couldn't muster the courage to look him in the eyes as she spoke her mind, so she focused on his zen garden once more. The sand had be scrapped haphazardly in different directions and was the most unruly part of his office, she noticed. 

He shifted in the corner of her eyes, crossing his arms. "It was a lot harder when I first started." 

The intense earnestness of his voice compelled her to look up at him. He continued to stare ahead as he spoke, heavy brows furrowed in thought. 

"I had just graduated with a degree in fine arts and I won a national painting competition a few months later. And before I knew it, I suddenly became the struggling tortured artist stereotype." 

Amber felt a pang as she recalled her dad trying to explain countless times about how becoming an artist wasn't a realistic career choice. 

"I tried everything. I tried to freelance. I tried to sell on the internet. I tried to open my own store. But nothing seemed to come together. So I started using other skills to get by. I took a few computer classes and I started to help people build their websites. I didn't love it but it paid well. I carried on painting when I had the time but life gets busy, you know? I got recruited here a few years ago and I guess you could call it a happy medium." 

He seemed to retract himself from his thoughts and settled his gaze on Amber, giving her a delayed grin, flashing his flawless teeth this time. "Is that what's bothering you? The lack of real art? Compromising artistic integrity?" 

She felt a chill run through her veins as he echoed the exact words Alex had uttered during their first fight. "That's exactly it." 

Matthew quieted for a moment, seemingly trying to choose his words wisely. "You have a really promising career here, Amber, I can tell you that much. These opportunities get snatched up fast because the chances of becoming a successful artist - without having compromised your integrity, your true artistic desire - is incredibly small. And I don't say that lightly either. You know after I won that competition, I was featured in a few big magazines and I was pegged as the next young new thing but honestly, it was all closed doors and no support after that. So maybe this isn't so bad after all. You can paint to your heart's desire once you get home and you can keep trying to be noticed. But this way, you'll be able to afford the paint." 

As much as she wanted to scream and shout that she was still young and talented, with so much potential to be the kind of artist she wanted to be, deep inside of her, his words latched on to something. What he said was painful to hear but it was sensible. Amber guessed this was part of growing up and forgetting her age after all. 

She picked up her marker again and went to her sketchbook. Seeing that he had settled some kind of conflict within her, Matthew silently straightened from his desk and went back to his seat. 

"Thank you," she said, without looking up from her sketchbook and from the corner of her eyes she saw a flash of white teeth.

***

Amber went home that evening having finished some samples for some of her and Matthew's clients feeling heartened by his words. Sure, she had a lot to juggle at the moment but it wasn't the end of the world that she wouldn't have time to paint for a while. It would always be there waiting for her. After receiving a quick text from her father saying that he was working a night shift and would be home late, Amber decided to go and visit Alex for the first time in a few days. They had seen each other in school but a few stolen glances wasn't enough to keep her satisfied these days. 

Alex was cooking dinner when she arrived. The pleasant warm scent of pasta wafted over her as she kicked off her boots and pulled off her hat and scarf.