**A FEATURED STORY ON WATTPAD**
Amanda insists on finding love in real life to offset her predominately online existence; Ian calculates his way towards potential dates with probabilities and statistics. Only hilarity and a cast of lively characters...
The idea of exceeding the serving size limit of three Oreos excited Ian at first, but then it unsettled him. Not only would eating more than three Double Stuf cookies violate his health rules, it deviated from his commitment to live a rational and disciplined life. Shaking his head, Ian pushed thoughts of cookie gorging out of his mind and clicked the arrow button to view Amanda's third photo.
He found a full body image of Amanda standing in front of a Godiva Chocolate's display. Styled in a black short sleeved dress hemmed at the knee, Amanda stood awkwardly in a pair of black heels--her arms stiffly positioned against her sides as though not sure what to do with her hands. Despite having a black belt to assist her waistline, Amanda's midsection lacked the universally preferred .70 waist-to-hip ratio men are biologically wired to desire--a waist's width being close to 70 percent of the hip's width. Regardless, a healthy glow still emanated from Amanda's core. Her waist may have hovered in the 90 percentiles, but her inner sparkle ranked at a practically perfect score.
Ian read the picture's description: Whatever, Forrest. Life isn't like a box of chocolates. A box of chocolates IS life.
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The forth picture in the OKCupid album was an image of Winnie waking Amanda up with a furry asshole to the face. Amanda's facial expression in the photo was one of disgust--her head retracted so far back behind her shoulders, her chin hid amongst the folds in her seal neck rolls. Ian immediately directed his focus to the photo's description to see what Amanda had written--a grin already taunting the edge of his lips.
Woke up with a pussy in my mouth. I suppose these are my experimental years. Pretty sure lady tail isn't my thing.
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Ian snickered. Amanda would fit in with Team Goonies like a hand fits the Infinity Gauntlet. She could be Stef, he thought. Stef was the coolest--more so than Andy. And Stef's glasses--. Ian inhaled and sighed as he moved the cursor towards the arrow to reveal the next photo. Women in glasses are so sexy.
When the fifth picture appeared on Ian's screen, his heart accelerated, pounding wildly against his ribcage. It was an image of a teenage Amanda with Corey Feldman, both dressed in ridiculously tacky 80's attire. However, it wasn't the image causing all the excitement, it was the description.
