Mr. Babydoll and the journals of his inner blizzard [peterick]

XV

The next day, I couldn't sit still anymore, so I wrapped an old, red scarf around my neck and went outside.
I was unable to get my thoughts under control anymore, they gained the upper hand and they wouldn't hesitate to destroy my mind from the inside if I stayed inside the apartment any longer.

That "I-wanna-stay-inside-and-never-go-outside-again" ideology that a lot of people nourish and cherish didn't really work for me. Don't get me wrong, I'd stay inside every day if I had the chance, but my apartment is too small and my thoughts are too much.

Let's see how fast I'll regret this.

I found the bar again. It's beyond me how I even saw it since it was halfway covered in snow. The entrance was free and now I saw the glowing letters above it that spelled Lindsey's.

Lindsey smiled welcoming at me as I came in. The bar was pretty full and I had trouble finding a table. My regret to come here only grew when I heard a way too familiar voice calling my name.

"Petey! Over here!"

Brendon was waving at me from the other side of the room, smiling brightly and it caught a little too much attention for my liking. He wasn't alone. Ryan was sitting across from him and smiled shyly. Morally, I had no chance but walk over to them.

"Didn't expect to see you here." I said, smiling as I approached their table.
"Me neither, dude! Especially when I heard you called in sick. The shop doesn't really have the same atmosphere without you." Brendon fidgeted in his chair and I noticed he had cut his hair a bit.
I hid my hands in my pockets.

"Don't get too used to me working there. One day I'll quit and do something else."

Brendon took an empty chair from another table and placed in next to him. "Take a seat, man." he offered and gestured to the chair.
"Oh no, I really don't wanna disturb your uhm..." I almost said date, but is there really another no-homofied name I could call it? Friendly get-together ?

"Dude, that's no problem at all. We'd love to have you sit with us! Wouldn't we, Ryan?"

Ryan shrugged his thin shoulders. "Wouldn't mind."

Although I still wasn't convinced and I felt that famous feeling that told me how unwanted I was right now, I took a seat.
"So, how's the music going?" I asked awkwardly.
"Oh, it's great. The people seem to like our songs. We earn enough to keep the wolf from the door, if you know what I mean." he took a quick sip from his drink. "It's great, I'm truly having the time of my life. Maybe it's dramatic to phrase it like that, but it's true."

Brendon was truly the backbone of this conversation, but it was nothing that bothered me. Ryan was just pretty quiet overall and nodded or smiled slightly every now and then. Somehow I could understand how you could fall for him.
The bar was still pretty full, so I wasn't angered at all when Lindsey approached our table some time later. I simply ordered a glass of water since my throat was still pretty sore. Brendon was in the middle of telling a story about how the band had spent some time in a lonely cabin in the mountains and they were all pretty high. Ryan apparently burned his electric guitar and when someone asked what time it was, someone else answered with: "It's nine in the afternoon."

"Wait, nine doesn't happen in the afternoon!" I exclaimed surprised after it took me way too long to get it. Brendon laughed. "That's the thing! I love it and we started to use it as some sort of inside joke. But one of the things I loved the most was when this farmer called us and we had to chase those bunnies across the field, am I right Ryan?"

Ryan smiled softly and looked down in an attempt to hide his slightly blushing face. "Yeah, you got me one."
Brendon smiled back and then turned to me. "Right! I caught a bunny for him. We took it to the vet after we were back in town and we're allowed to keep it! We called it Sugarcane."