The Bad Boy and His Good Side (Shawn Mendes AU)

Chapter 4

-If this wasn't clear already Aaron is Aaron Carpenter.-

We pulled away and looked to each other. I just kissed my best friend. He mumbled Beautiful to me then pulled a sheet up closer over my body.

Did he get the wrong idea from that.
He could think it meant we were a item now. I didn't even have feelings for him, but I said yes because I needed the comfort of a kiss.

What did it even mean.
To me it was just something because the moment felt right.So it wasn't really worth anything. I stopped, trying to recall whether or not, I'd just taken his first—half my memory had been warped enough without anxiety.

But what did it he think.
Because it definitely didn't mean I was his girlfriend. I couldn't be we were always meant to be friends. Let alone did I want a boyfriend right now, when your last boyfriend tries to kill you you're done with relationships for a while.

-Shawn's POV-

I got home late; the door was locked, all the lights were out and not even the low hum of my dad's evening load of wash could be heard anymore. Everyone had fallen asleep at least an hour before, I could tell from how still everything felt. There were two decisions: climb in my bedroom window or not go in at all. Groaning I grabbed on to a limb of the tree I esclated up the side. As I reached the top I pushed open the window, someone turned off a light across the cul-de-sac. I could see the shape of two people kissing in one of the rooms in the glow of headlights from the same black van from earlier. That was her house, her room. Another car drove by illuminated the room again. Aaron and her both lay on her bed, the covers up to her chest and she layed on him. There were no cars in the driveway so she was alone. His presences surprised, especially if her parents left her by herself—it'd ruin that pristine image of her that survived in my head.

After standing, more so hanging, there for a few seconds I yanked open the window the rest of the way and threw myself in. Unfortunately, I landed with a loud thump which made the picture frames on my desk rattle. After laying there to recollect my breath, I groaned. Being too exhausted, I didn't even change out of my clothes before belly-flopping onto my mattress.

The next morning, I woke up to the sound of laughter outside, I looked out the window. They were both outside just talking on her front porch. He said something that made her luagh and playfully hit his chest. She looked so perfect from what I could see, maybe I could get closer. They didn't exactly hate me, justed ignored me. I changed into fresh clothes, and walked across the street.

"Hi." I waved to them. Vivian looked up at me slightly shocked.

"What did you come here to hit on me again?" She snapped at me sounding pissed, which would be rational considering how I could get.

I entirely forgot about that. "Listen I'm sorry about both times-well everytime actually-I thought maybe we could talk or something."

"Yeah, I'm sure you are but leave please." She said sarcatically.

"I just want to.." I started but Aaron cut me off.

"No offence, but just go." He was about to say something else but stopped, probably some insult and it would probably have been true. That must've been why he stopped, Aaron couldn't even bring himself insult Ian.

Turning around, I shoved my hands in my pockets, and started down the cobble stone pathway leading from her house. What was I thinking: of course they did that. Why would she want to talk to me, she certainly had her fill with people like myself after her old boyfriend died, which surely would've left a bad taste in her mouth.

She must've have thought I was all bad but really I wasn't—not that I could blame her when see only saw the darkest side of how two-faced I was. Still, I wanted to make her see the good in me. It can't be impossible, around her all the bad I was would slightly decrease. At the same time; it really was impossible because sometimes around her I was worse. The part of me that I thought of as sinister, tried drowning out the real part of me. At this point, that part was suffering. Yet, somehow, someday, I knew I could and would make her see it.

I guess all I could do was sit on the side and watch as everyone else fell with a chance of not being hurt. I knew-despite the fact it was useless-I had to try not to stumble falling head over heals for her. Useless, because it almost already happened. Almost, I had to restrain or just entirely ignore my feelings somehow. Someway I would.

In the glass door I could see the reflection of her, she was looking at me leave. She just seemed interested in me, I stopped and stood there. Her image looked at Aaron and started talking again. He looked down at his phone, said something to her, they both got up and hugged, he then kissed her forehead and left.

Beautiful. Was the one and only thing I could actually think about her.

But she now sat alone out side. She looked in my direction, I turned around only to make her look away.

-Aaron's POV

As I walked away from her house I thought about our two am kiss. What did it mean, I don't think I should ask her. I can't deny I have a slight bit of feelings for her, but we were too close of friends, the feelings weren't that strong and even if they were it wouldn't matter she doesn't go for guys like me. There was that and the fact we promised to never fall for each other when we were little.

That didn't mean I was going to stop protecting her. I couldn't stop worrying about her sense the accident. She nearly fucking died, she was like a my sister to me, but at the same time a kind of girlfriend. It was just complicated.

What did this kiss mean to her. Maybe I should figure out what it meant to me first before asking her. I tunred it over in my mind as I walked home. The kiss was well, perfect: her lips were warm and soft, I liked it. Taking a deep breath I dailed her number, it wasn't that hard just ask something like "Hey uh, what did the kiss mean to you?"

I can't.

"Aaron?" Her voice was so clear through the phone. "I know you're there, I can hear your breathing." I heard her groan and hang up.

You can do it just call her back and ask.

When I got back to my room I called her over video chat. She answered and I when I tried to talk I froze up. I continously stutterd out random words, she giggled at me. I never got nervous around her and I could feel my cheeks turning red.

"Wanna meet at the tree house?" She asked, I weakly nodded.

I walked a few blocks until I got there.