The Victim (A Mindless Behavior Story)

All of Us Had it Bad

Hey everyone, I apologize for not updating it's just I have been busy and having writers block a lot lately. But I will try to update for the next couple of days, though. I love this book just as much as you guys, and I finally finished the song as well. So you'll see it soon.

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Since yesterday my family has been more quieter than ever. No one speaks or laughs or even smiles when were near eachother. We can't even be in the same room. None of us had nothing to say, we were all speechless. I still honestly do wonder if me telling them what I have been going through was a mistake. Maybe it was, I mean it's not like anything changed. I just don't know what to do anymore, I'm honestly just confused. By now I was in my room listening to music, and staring at the wall.

It was once again another thinking session which soon became a new crying session along with it. I just so much on my mind. I just got dressed for school, only to put on my white polo tee shirt and my black jeans with my all blue air force ones with my black and white polo jacket, I wore my hair down and it was straight with some lip gloss, and my blue and white Nike snapback, with everything I needed for school and myself. Before I could even leave the house I see that the living room was trashed with beer bottles and food I only look to see that my dad had been drinking and crying and soon after my mom walks down to comfort him.

"I can't believe, she's like this. I just can't take it, I don't like how my own daughter is acting, I can't even look at her without wanting to cry, and I just want to hug her and tell her everything is fine, but it's not. " I heard him say with his voice cracking.

"Well, it's both of our fault. I never have her anything she asked for Trey always got everything. I always saw you in her eyes everytime I looked into them. I really messed up this time. I just didn't know she felt thus bad that she cuts herself to get rid of the pain. I just wish we could make things right with her." My mother said holding him close and trying to calm him down without crying herself.

Honestly, I had a good heart but at the same time I had an evil streak. I truly felt guilty about making them feel like this but at the same time I felt like they deserved it. They did if you ask me. I just don't know I'm so.confused. After hearing that I was at the door leaving the house until I heard "Maybe that will work" I knew it wasn't just a crying session it was a way to make me feel bad at the same time. With that I went to school, and went straight to class I just took down notes and did what I had to do for the period, and did all my classwork and homework before lunch so I could go somewhere and write poetry like I always do. It was the only way I could think. I was happy when the lunch bell rung. I grabbed my notebook and pen with my headphones as well as my phone and grabbed a small snack before I went to the dance room where me and Princeton had to work in. I see that no one was there, and I just walked in and sat down in a chair right in front of a table. 

I ate my snack and wrote down exactly what I was feeling. It was nice to get things off my chest. I honestly didn't want to just run to Roshon for all my problems. I felt that he had a life of his own to live and I didn't want to mess that up with my bullshit. But he did have some good points as well it's just I don't trust them. I wrote down all my feelings in one sheet of paper. After I was done I started listening to Tink- Treat Me Like Somebody.

That song was talking the real truth, on how I felt. I just wanted somebody to treat me like somebody, and love me, I don't ask for much, it's just specific. I just wanted someone to treat me like a person and just make me happy. It wasn't much but I knew that would be to much for some people. After that thinking session I walked back to class and went to my next one which was Math. Where I had class with all of these idiots that I didn't want to pay attention to today. I just sat down and did the same thing I did in my last class. I didn't pay them any attention, they were mad that I didn't pay them any mind. I just did what I had to do. Soon after class I just went home and went to my room where I was actually at peace. I sat on my bed listened to music. Once my brother and his friends got home I just stayed in my room. I got up only to get a fruit cup. I just got those same looks like they always did. It was getting on my nerves.

"What?" I said staring back at them.

"It's just hard to look at you and not be angry or sad." Prince said.

"You never had a problem with it till now. So what I cut myself, I've felt that way for 15 years, and now is the time y'all choose to act like you actually care. It took guilt yo make y'all feel thus way? Wow, now I really see how stupid y'all really are." I said with pure anger in my voice.

"Look can you stop making us feel like this, it's not like we already don't feel bad. Bruh I would try to change what I've done to you, but I can't so can you just let it go." My brother said looking at me in the eye. See it wasn't me making them feel like thus. The guilt was eating them up inside, see I thought I had it bad. It was them that did as well they just didn't want to admit it.

"Your making yourself guilty, not me" I said to all of them and I left the room and went into my room. I was happy they were feeling like this but at the same time I was having it just as bad as them.

I knew somethings weren't right anymore. I felt like something was coming my way, and it wasn't good. Aft we thinking so much my head started to hurt.  I was laying down until my door opens to see that Trinity was at my door.

"Umm hi I guess." I said I honestly had nothing to say to her.

"Hey, can we talk?" She asked. She sounded sincere but I didn't want to be bothered with her. She hangs out with my brother Lord only knows all the bullshit he adds her in.

"I guess." I said letting her in and telling her it sit down.

"Well I never really got a chance to actually talk to you. I mean you are my older sister, and I just wanted to actually have a shot at us starting off on the right foot." She said she looked dead in my eye about it, I don't trust her and plus I saw some peoples feet under the door, so I knew thus was set up.

"Look, I mean you'll be fine, you'll have the one thing I never had, love and affection. I would kill for that, but for me that doesn't exist. See I just want you to be happy, and I personally think you need them more than me. I can't do anything for you." I said to her which is something they didn't expect. Theyppp wanted me to give her sympathy and tell her I would be there for her I knew I wasn't because she's gonna have the things I never had.

"But what about me and you as friends?" She asked.

"Honestly, I don't think mom and dad would want you around me. I don't want you to have the same pain I do." I said nicely. With that she left and I heard them all say damn. They were trying so hard to make it seem like they were trying to get through to me when I knew they just wanted me to feel as bad as they do, but they put me through all this and including my brothers friends, I'm still paying the price for it. That's when I realized all of us had it bad.

Hey everyone, tell me what you think I would really appreciate it. Tell me what you think is gonna happen. What do think is gonna happen next and your ideas. I would love to hear them. Love y'all, From you favorite writer Tatiana.

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