My New Obsession [BxB]

Chapter Eleven- I Find It Hard To Stay With The Words You Say

 “How was your morning?” I asked George, kissing him on the cheek.

 “Mediocre. You?” he asked.

 “Well, I met Bex, so good.” I said, looking at her, and her grin got even bigger. George squeezed my hand and smile but there was a weird look in his eye. Something told me we would be having a ‘chat’ later.

 Jake hadn’t had the opportunity to go and buy us a new case of beer, so we just smoked, apart from Rich and Matt- Matt having reverted to being a non-smoker. Bex looked a little wary as we lit up and I worried that she didn’t agree with smoking. I worried that she was getting a bad impression of us.

 “D’you smoke?” I asked her, keeping my cigarette in one corner of my mouth as I threw the pack back to Jake.

 “Well…” she said. She was eyeing up my cigarette. Suddenly she snatched it from my lips and raised it to hers, inhaling deeply. Her eyes were shut and as she exhaled a look of pleasure crept over her face.

 “Don’t do that!” Jake said, pulling the cigarette out of her hand and tossing it into the tress.

 “Dude, that was mine?” I said, arms raised.

 “She’s a quitter! Did you not see it? She’d quit smoking!” Jake said.

 I pulled another cigarette out and Bex told us that her mum had made her quit smoking after she found out about it. I felt bad about smoking near her, but she sat there with her hands on her awkward knees and made no other attempt at having a cigarette. When it was the end of lunch we all stamped out the cigarettes and dispersed one by one until it was just me and George and Bex. George kissed me on the cheek and asked me to meet him by his locker after school. I wondered why he was asking, considering I always met him there anyway. I agreed and then he left, still acting weirdly.

 As me and Bex walked back to school, we talked about music. She had relatively the same music taste as me and the guys so I told her about the band and she said she’d like to see us sometime. We had Spanish fifth period and she sat next to me again. I was kind of surprised by how good her Spanish was- she even corrected our teacher on some things. After the lesson we walked together to the form block and, seeing as our lockers were next to each other, I went there with her first instead of going straight to George. I shook my Misfits bag off my shoulder and put away sorting out the books that I did or didn’t need for homework before shutting my locker. We switched phone numbers and then she hugged me and left. I walked down the rest of the corridor to where George was leaning against his locker. The corridor was a lot emptier now.

 “Hey Gee.” I said, kissing him on the cheek.

 “Hey, Jay.”

 I picked up on the nickname and smiled. I took hold of his hand and we walked down the corridor and out of the form block. He didn’t speak as we walked down the street. He didn’t let go of my hand when we got to the bus stop, so apparently I was going home with him. We sat down on two seats next to each other on the bus and he leaned his head on my shoulder as normal but looked out of the window instead of talking. We got off the bus.

 “Gee, for the love of Billie Joe, would you just tell me what’s wrong?” I snapped. He looked at me and then suddenly became rather interested in his shoes.

 “I’m sorry, James, I just… You know me, Jay. You understand my brain and how paranoid I am. And you used to be so shy and quiet and then this girl has been at our school for a day and you’re friends with her. We were the ones that brought you out of your shell a little, and I just…” he tailed off at the end. I lunged forward and grabbed hold of his hand.

 “You think I’m going to start liking her? Instead of you?” I asked. He nodded, head still down. “Are you serious? Are you fucking kidding me? I’m straight! I’m not even gay! And yet you turn me- you’re the only guy who can!”

 He tore his hand away.

 “That’s my whole fucking point, James! I’m the only guy you like. Apart from me, you only like girls. What if you decide that you don’t even like me anymore, that you like girls and just girls?”

 “Did you actually just ask me that as if I decide who I fall for? You don’t choose who you fall in love with, George!”

 “So what you’re saying is that you would choose to be with me? Is that what you’re-”

 “Did I say that? No, I didn’t say that, did I? I said-”

 “-because it sounds to me like that’s what you’re saying…”

 His head was up now and he was looking at me with venom in his eyes. Why was he so mad? I’d only met Bex today, and now he’s thinking that I want her?

 “How do you think I feel, George? How do you think I fucking feel when we’re at school or out somewhere and everywhere we go there are girls eye-fucking you? How do you think I feel when we walk past girls and we’re holding hands and they’re looking at me with their stupid narrowed eyes and I know they’re jealous of me?” I yelled suddenly. I surprised myself, so I had no idea how George was going to react.

 “Why do you think I’d even look twice at one of those girls when I’m holding your hand?” he asked quietly.

 “Excuse me? Did you or did you not just accuse me of wanting Bex?” I justified. He bit his lip.

 “Maybe you should go, James.” he whispered.

 “Yeah, maybe I should.”

 I turned on my heel and stalked away.