How to love - Markus x reader

Chapter fifteen

You push a slighty warm cup of coffee towards Markus, avoiding his eyes. "Here, I brought you something."

The two of you were on a rooftop of an abandoned building, near Jericho. He had asked you to join him and get some fresh air, away from the ship. At first, you was hesitant, worried what would happen. But then, he cupped your face gently with his cold hands, but you felt warm at his touch.

"I just want to talk, (Y/n)." So you agreed.

Now, standing at the edge of the roof, you could see the skyline of Detroit, empty carparks covered in fresh snow, and the cold floor that was empty other than a grand piano and a metal table..

"You know I don't need to drink to stay alive." He stated, but wrapped his hands around the styrofoam cup with a grateful look.

"So..." You mumbled, shifting awkwardly. Your new arm creaked, like shifting gears of a machine.

Markus had spent two days searching for a new component after you had injured yours breaking the glass, but refused your help. Everything between the two of you was painfully tense, and the little sacrifices he made only seemed to worsen it.

He looked up, and gave you a small smile, and your chest seemed to grow tighter, as if a weight was swelling inside, bursting with a strange kind of happiness, except that was impossible. Because even if robots could have feelings, but they would never have hearts.

"We need to talk about what you did to Leo." You flinched upon hearing his name, and looked at the ground.

"I gave him some pills, that's all." You didn't want to talk about him, or anything from the past. It seemed so painful to even think about it, but you knew when night fell, he haunted your dreams, and you would wake up with wet cheeks and a loud ringing in your ears.

Markus sighed,"What pills?"

Red ice.

"Just some stuff I had." You said casually, your back stiffer than his voice.

"Why the fuck would you have pills in your posession, (Y/n)?" He asked, his voice calm but with angry eyes.

I don't know.

Because you don't know anything about me.

Even though you act like it.

"I don't know. It makes me happy, I guess." You mumbled, your fingers trembling slightly as you crossed them behind your back.

Markus pushed his chair back and stood up, walking closer to you, and your body tensed up.

"(Y/n)." You loved how he pronounced your name, the way it rolled off his tongue, and his lips twisted slightly as he said it.

Oh god, what is happening to me?

"Yes?" You whispered, suddenly too frightened to speak. He was so close now, that you could see your own reflection in his blue and green eyes, in shades of ocean and forests.

"I want you to be honest with me, (Y/n). That's all." If you tiptoed, you could kiss him, and you was suddenly tempted to press your lips against his, and wonder how it would feel. Except he took a step back and stared at you calmly, as if nothing had happened.

Fuck, how could I have been so stupid? So, so stupid.

"(Y/n)?" His voice sounded millions of miles away, as if calling from another state. The only thing audible was your shallow breathing, and the thirium rushing through you quickly, like waves of sadness. It's nothing, nothing. Fat tears rolled down your face, and you wiped them away furiously.

"I should go, Markus. Enjoy your coffee." You stomped away, slamming the door behind you and fleeing down the stairs, two steps a time towards Jericho, away from Markus.

What the fuck just happened?

Why couldn't we connect like how he does with North- why does he like her, when we knew each other for much longer?

But the thoughts that followed could only get worse.

Because I'm so, so, so stupid. I never had a chance.

-
A/n:

Hello! I'm Kay, the android sent by Cyberlife to share some memes with you all

Markus rhymes with Karcus ☻

And can we talk about how handsome Markus is in this one:

(So F!CKING BEAUTIFUL, AM I RIGHT?)

Let me know what you think of the story so far, and thanks for reading ^_^ ♡