The Unexpected

Chapter 9: Total Wreck

Liam's POV…

“Daddy, daddy...”

I looked down into the love of my life brightly shining eyes as she tugs on my leg with a big smile on her face. The happiness I was feeling a second ago disappeared when the guilt of how I first reacted towards my beautiful daughter when I first laid eyes on her slammed into me.

Flashback started:

Losing my wife was proving to be too painful for me. A feeling of despair took over after learning I would never see her beautiful face again or feel her run her fingers through my hair after a long day at work. 

How could anyone expect me to look at the one person that has taken my wife away from me? I heard her loud cry, the moment she came out of her mother as I stood on the opposite side of the door. Her booming cries pierced the silence on the outside of the door where I was standing. It was a heartbreaking cry that I could feel deep down in my soul. It was like she knew that both of her parents had abandoned her. I still couldn't bring myself to look at her or allow myself to feel her pain even after hearing her broken cries.

A couple of hours ago I was ready to hold my daughter in my arms but now I couldn't even stand to hear her loud cries. I could sense that her crying was her way of begging me to look at her but my pain was too deep. I walked away from the nurse who had brought her out to meet me without even looking at her. It seemed like her cries became louder and louder with every step that I took away from her. No matter how loud she wailed I still couldn't make myself turn around and go comfort her.

I slid down the wall to the floor outside the loung room and let a piercing scream escape my lips, disrupting the serene peace in the hallway. Everyone that was close by just stopped whatever they were doing and stared at me, some in fear, others were in shock. I felt totally out of sync with the world, like I was dead on the inside. 

I wanted to just sit there and wallow in my pain and desperation. I was planning on doing just that, but my mother had other plans for me. Her small, petite frame squatted down next to me. With a grievous look on her face, she placed her small, slender hands on both sides of my face, forcing me to look up into her eyes.

“Liam, honey I know this is hard for you but your daughter needs you right now son.” She says to me.

“I can't look at her right now mom!” I snapped violently. “I will not look at the one person that has destroyed my life.”

“None of this is your daughter, my grandbaby's fault.” My mom says appalled at my reaction.

“I can't help what I feel mom. I don't want to see her!” I say refusing to change my mind.

“But Liam, she's your daughter! Little Ashley didn't ask to be born into this world. You laid down with her mother and made her.”

“Her name will not be Ashley!” I yelled. “She doesn't deserve to be given my wife's name too. Isn't it enough that she took her life?”

“I've listened to enough of your foolishness Liam. I get that you're grieving but taking your pain out on your daughter is just too cold-blooded. Your wife would be very disappointed in how you're treating her daughter. hell I'm even ashamed to call you my son. You call yourself a man all I see is a spoiled little boy in a grown man's body,” Mom snaps with disappointment in her voice and tears in her eyes.

I've never seen my mom this upset as I watch her storm off down the hallway. Although I heard every word that she said that still didn't make me budge. Placing my head in my hands, I continued to wallow in my pain.