I HATE YOU

15

tae.

i read them all.

all of your words.

and i just want to start this off by saying,

i'm sorry.

i'm sorry i was so blind and so scared to love you.

your love was everything i needed and i was too naive to see that.

you know i loved you too, right?

walking out on you wasn't easy, no matter how much you believe that it was.

i was broken, you know that.

you knew that the night you met me.

i was a goddamn mess, that's for sure. and if in your eyes i was a beautiful mess, i'm okay with that.

but secondly

thank you.

thank you for loving me like you did, for being there for me like you were.

i didn't deserve it.

i never will.

but most of all, tae, no matter how much this fucking kills me, knowing i hurt you in ways i would never dream of,

i'm so proud of you.

you've come so far, you know that?

like look at you.

if anyone deserves self love, it's you.

and if you ever doubt that you deserve it, take some of my love for you.

i know i have a dangerously bitter way of showing it, but i will always love you, tae.

i know right now you'll never love me like you did and i definitely don't deserve it; but you do.

take all the love you had for me and invest it in yourself.

and knowing that even though i shattered you, ruined you, hurt you, you still managed to thank me?

you are every bit of selfless, caring, and extraordinary.

so no, tae, thank you for showing me what true love was like- before and after.

you never fail to amaze me, taehyung,

and for that i'm just
really
really
thankful i got the chance to be loved and hated by you.

take care.

sora.

end.