peaches | fillie

twenty-nine

The worrying wouldn't stop there, either. In only a year, Millie would be anxious about the same topic, but regarding herself and her second family. Only one more year until Millie would walk across that stage herself and accept her diploma. Only one more year.

Finn tugged at Millie's hand, pulling her out of her mind for just enough time to see that they were outside of the Cheesecake Factory. Sadie, Caleb, and Finn had all organized a combined graduation party with some of their closest friends and family, and the first stop was the gang's favorite restaurant.

"You worry to much, sugar," the raven-haired boy breathed out, caressing Millie's jaw with his thumb. His eyebrows furrowed as he studied her now pale face, creases forming on his forehead.

He was probably right.

***

Millie bumped her shoulder into Finn's as they shuffled into the restaurant, her grip on his hand tighter than ever before.

"I won't fly away if you loosen your hand, babe," he whispered to her. She glanced down at their entwined fingers, letting his hand go slightly.

"Oh, I didn't even realize,"

She hadn't realized that she had such a strong hold, it just all felt so imaginary; if she didn't grab onto him and pull him close, he would disappear.

She takes a deep breath before they get closer to the table, calming herself down.

Everything is okay, she scolded her mind. There is nothing to be worked up over.

But the problem was that there was everything to be upset about. Her boyfriend was leaving her, and with him would go her heart. He would find someone else, unknowing that her heart remained to beat in his palm. Everything she was—and ever will be—belonged to him, and it was terrifying. It was scary that she was losing the holder of everything that was hers, and it was scary that she was so willing to give him everything.

She shot the people around the table a tight smile, hiding slightly behind Finn's slender figure. She didn't tell him how much she loved his body enough, and now she wouldn't be able to make up for it. He was leaving and she would be alone and she would have to pick up the pieces.

"Shy, are we?" Finn teases. Millie nods, her throat feeling tight. She wants to be with him right now, wants to support him on his big day, but she wishes she could be back to supporting him six months ago when their end wasn't looming over her.

"There are just a lot of new faces, nothing serious," Millie assures him. She hopes it sounded more convincing to him than it did to her own ears. His frown deepens, but he decides to trust her. "I'm just gonna go to the bathroom, I'll be right back," she says with a kiss to his cheek. He watches her suspiciously as she speeds away, but is torn away from her small form when his old theater friend claps a hand on his shoulder.

Sadie hadn't been distracted by anyone, though, so she quietly excused herself and hurried behind the short girl.

***

Millie feels selfish for thinking that she'll be alone when Sadie and Finn leave. She has Gaten and Noah, her best fucking friends, and she doesn't need anyone else. They can have endless taco parties and movie marathons and they can do all of the things that they hadn't been able to since Millie got a boyfriend.

But what if they left too? Millie had overheard Gaten talking to Noah about a job opportunity that his father was considering, one that would land him in Minnesota. He hadn't told Millie yet, probably to avoid stressing her out, but part of her was scared that he didn't want her to know. What if his plan was just to leave and never tell her about it? She would be walking home one day from school, alone, and then stumble upon Noah and Gaten filling a moving truck with all of the curly-haired boy's belongings, saying, "oh, you didn't get the invitation? It must've gotten lost in the mail."