Take your chance - Marcus & Martinus FF

Martinus's POV

I think it was pretty good that Marcus came and brought me to some other thoughts. It really helped me! I still don't know what's going on with me. I mean I'm wondering about my own behavior. Is it all just because if Elli or because of Marcus and her dating or is it just the fact that Marcus has a girlfriend and I don't have one? Nothing about him! I love him he is my brother, my twin brother! But He is the first born child. He always stood infront of me and was way more perfect and popular than i am. Just take a look at our fans. Most of them are #TeamMac!!! They prefer him, they like him more. I always stayed in his shadow and maybe I just wanted to step out of this position and be the first one who has got a girlfriend. Maybe I hoped that Elli would fall on love with me and not with Marcus. Common Martinus! Your talking so much shit right now. Nothing of that is true! You know that, they know that.....everyone knows that. But do I really know that??!

Marcus was Laying down on my bed and opened WhatsApp. Suddenly he began to smile.

,,What's up? Who texted you?" I was wondering and laughed.

,,Just Elli!" And he smiled happily.

But my face turned into a ,,Pokerface" or how ever you would describe it.
,,Oh ok cool, I guess! What about making some new musically's? We haven't posted some since a long time now. Our fans wait for some new ones." I offered. But Marcus was just tipping on his phone and smiling.

,,Hello! Marcus?!" I jumped on the bed and began to anyone him. But he couldn't stop looking on his phone.

,,What did you say?" He asked. It's enough, so I took his phone and opened musically instead.

,,We are making some new musically's! That's our job Marcus! We have to give our fans what they want. Did you forget that?" I scrolled trough the song suggestions.

,,No I didn't forget that! Maybe I was just interested in something else right now! So please give me my phone back. We can do some musically's later." He tried to pull his phone out of my hand but I was too fast for him.

,,so you put a stupid message from Elli over your fans that support you since such a long time, with everything that you do, say, or whatever!!! I see...I definitely didn't forget it." I turned his phone of and put it in my pocket. Now we are on the point were we need to talk! I know that I was maybe overreacting, but that's not the point right now.

Marcus sat back on my bed and looked at me like he doesn't understand what I just said.
,,Whats wrong with you Martinus?"

,,With me? nothing! I'm fine....but are you fine, Marcus?" Now I'm completely in rage and nothing can stop me now. I don't even know why I'm so angry...gosh I'm more confused about my own behavior than he is.

,,Yeah I'm! Im more than Fine....im fantastic! And do you know why? Because the most beautiful, smart, nice, lovely girl in the entire world wrote ME a STUPID MESSAGE were she wrote >>I.......LOVE.......YOU<<!!! So please don't wonder why I'm smiling and why I'm happy and don't have time for some STUPID MUSICALLY'S..."

I'm nearly afraid of him. I've never seen him like that  before. He is completely in rage and angry as hell. Ok, now I really went toooo far. And I felt guilty.
,,I'm....Ehm...I'm sorry Marcus! I didn't meant It like that!"

,,Oh you didn't? Martinus we are twins! We know how the other feels! And I know that somethings up with you and you just don't want to talk about it. You know I'm always here for you...nothing will never change that. But please, when you are  not in a good mood or something else, don't let it out on me. Don't ruin my Happiness. Because that goes way too far. Ok?!" He stood up and walked to his room, where he closed his door.

Now I stood alone in the middle of my room and wasn't able to think or say something. He is right! He unfortunately is soooo right!
I'm a jerk. A big Jerk. I should just be happy for him that he found the girl of his dreams and that she likes him too. One day I will find a girl like her too and fall in love with her. And when that happens...I want to be happy and to get things said about me that are not true, just because I'm happy. No one wants that.

I felt a little tear rolling down my cheek. Right now....I don't feel anything except guilt.

I laied down in my bed and looked at the wall.
My head Is empty and my heart feels like it's been wrapped in a box or stone. Heavy.