My Possessive Bully

Chapter 38: The Breakdown

Another ocean of tears began to fall consistently from my eyes in playing his voice over in my mind, wondering still how he could have gone through all this at such a young age.

"When was the last time you visited your mother?"

"I never gone to her grave, Mr. Stymest forbidden me to."

"Let's get you there."

"No."

"Justin, you've to forgive yourself. Your mother would want that for you. To be happy. It was accident, it wasn't your fault."

"No it is my fault. Its all my fucking fault. Mr. Stymest did the right thing."

"What did he do to you Justin?"

"N-nothing."

"Relax."

"Stop this. Please jasmine. Make it go away."

"Shh...its okay."

I led his head in my laps. He was shaking. I ran my hands through his hairs for him to calm. He lent in my touch and closed his eyes. I was in deep thoughts. I kissed his temples. He opened his eyes, "okay..we'll go."

A small smile tugged at corner of my lips.

He didn't even knew where his mother buried. His father kept him away all those times. Its hard to digest but he should at least talked to Justin about what really happened. He assumed that Justin pushed his mother off the cliff deliberately.

Now I know why he kept himself so distant from his family. After talking to someone on phone he came and we took off.

The graveyard was spooky. It was full of gravestones covered in some kind of slime. We searched for his mothers grave and finally he found it. He walked over to his mother's tombstone, under her name Marideth was an engravement, her last words, "Don't touch my cream of wheat son".

Gravestones lined the eerie graveyard, Some recently placed, whereas others, cracked and crumbling. Mould covered the engravings dedicated to the dead, trees leaning towards the stones, branches reaching out to each other. Spiked, black fences surrounded the graveyard almost like it was a prison. The smell of old stone filled the dry air, weeds covering the graves of the dead, loved ones long since stopped visiting. Gravel paths weave through the maze of graves, allowing passers by to pay their respects to the people lined up in the earths embrace.

He placed the flowers we got on our way on the grave which is now covered in tree leaves. I departed from him to give him space.

Justin's POV

I couldn't control my tears anymore. Seeing her name my eyes filled with tears. The old memories flooding my mind. I just sat there in front of her grave.

My gaze fell on the carved words.

"Don't touch my cream of wheat son"

I couldn't control this anymore. My mind was full and it's eating me. The voices were making me crazy.

"I miss everything about you mom, I miss your cooking, your laughter, your sense of humor, the way you could magically make everything better, most of all I miss hearing your voice say "I love you baby pie."
The day you died left a hole in my heart and a void in my life.
I know that you are here with me though, that makes me feel less alone. I can feel you at the oddest times, I've met up with you in my dreams, your smiling face telling me how much you missed me and how when it's time we'll be together.
I remember that horrible day, the day you took the last breath in front of me because of me with my little baby sibling within you. I'm still trying to make sense of the events unfolding, praying to God to give me a miracle, watching my life crumble before me, then I felt you, I knew in that moment you were with me, not in my heart, but right beside me, I could feel you, your love surrounding me, and you smiling at me. I knew in that moment I would never be really alone again, but that my heart would be permanently broken.
I always smile now though when people say "Do you believe in life after death?" I always say "Absolutely without a doubt."
I know that you're watching over me, and that you're still being a mom from the other side, I also know that a mother's love doesn't die when they do, it continues to grow and is forever infinite, that brings me comfort and a smile.
I miss you every second of every minute of every day. I miss you so much I try not to think of you, but I love you more than anything else in this entire universe, and I can't wait until it's my turn to come Home so we can be together again. Until then, keep watching over me, guide me in the right directions, and always keep me in your lovable sweet embrace, cause after all I am your son. In that moment of loss my world collapsed - where there was light became shadows, the pain coming and going like waves on frigid sand. Though my mind called out for yours the connection was gone... you were gone... and finally I knew that my time to be alone had come." I broke down completely forgetting the word around me.

Jasmine's POV

I stood at distant keeping my eyes on him the whole time to make sure he is fine. But he wasn't.

An analysis of the hardest thing I've ever had to deal with was seeing him Cry, i understood everything. No one is ever ready or prepared to see a loved one go, so when they do there is no way to cope.

When I lost my mother back, I felt like I was shouldering the whole world's weight. I felt life was being crushed with a huge stone and didn't know how to respond to the news. I was not used to living without that particular person for a quite a long time. My Mother was everything to me and my family. My Mother...

I was back in seconds when I heard loud sobs escaping his lips. I went to him giving him a shoulder to cry on. I hugged him running my hands all over his back.

We cried together.

We shared our vulnerabilities more readily than trading cards, interlocking our hearts as much as our fingers.

.........