Oh, Calamity (Chapter 10)

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Alex P.O.V.

It's a weird feeling, finally realizing that everything in your life is shit. It's been 3 days. I missed school today because i cant stand to actually see the damage i have done to Jack. Im laying on my bed, over the covers. I just can't motivate myself to get up. I've really fucked it up this time didn't I? Do i get up and get a drink or play guitar? Hm, why not both? I sat up to get the bottle of vodka thats in my dresser drawer, i picked it up and took a sip before i walked over and grabbed my guitar. Feels heavier than it normally does. Sitting back down, i started plucking the strings to bring back a familiar tune. Slowly i sang with a sad smile, " Yellow is green when you're being mean, blue is your fellow when you are friends with yellow.." I laughed feeling my heart break even more and more. I still need to do my project, fucckkkk. The end of the semester is soon and the project will be due. I probably should start on this without Jack since he wont be my partner anymore. Fuck. I took another few swigs of vodka before i started to write. Hmm, first line.. "When i was younger i was certain that i would be fine without a queen, just a kid inside his castle with an ocean in between, now all i do is sit, and count the miles from you to me, oh calamity...."

Flashback

Young Jack and young Alex were in their treehouse of course, today, they decided to play pirates. There was a tree that was across from the treehouse, big enough to sit on. Which Jack did, while alex drew on a fake beard and moustache.  "Hmmm Jack, you seem about 70 miles from me, because of the ocean in between us." Alex said stroking his drawn on beard. "Well im the one who is in the special tree! You'll never catch me! vvrrroooommmm!" Jack jumped out of the tree and pretended to swim on the grass. With that Alex proceeded to jump down and takle Jack. "Ouch! Alex dont jump on me!"Jack exclaimed "Oh im sorry.. I didnt mean to hurt you." Alex responded sadly "Its alright" Jack said happily " Now, like i was saying, YOU'LL NEVER CATCH ME I WILL GET TO THE TREASURE FIRST!" Jack yelled running home as Alex followed closely behind. When they got to Jack's house, Jack pulled out his candy jar and ate a piece in ront of Alex. Alex made his signature pouty face, so of course Jack gave in. Alex hugged Jack saying "I don't think i want the queen. You can have her. I'd rather have you."

I continued writing, taking big gulps of vodka while trying to produce lyrics to go with my favorite memories. My heart was hurting, so I slammed my fist against the desk, which produced a stabbing pain in my wrist. Why did i have to be such an idiot. Why do I screw up everything? I miss him, fuck i miss him. More lyrics decided to come to me, so i continued writing, even with my hand throbbing. I have to do this, i have to express how i feel to Jack. " We get older by the hour, Watch the changes from afar, Keep forgetting to remember, Where we've been is who we are, Now all i do is wonder, Why we ever set the scene, Oh calamity.." 

Flashback

"Jack, here i want to show you this hill i descovered. It's behind the woods, closer to the city." Alex explained as they were walking through a damp forest before sunset. The forest was green, full of bushes and beautiful trees. They were probably walking for a good 10 minutes when Jack decided he was tired so he stopped Alex. "How much longer? I'm tired, and i just ate dinner. If we keep walking i wont be able to hold down dinner." Jack complained " Jack, we are literally at the edge of the forest. Just a few more steps." Alex said as he pulled Jack from behind him. Jack deeply sighed and walked hand and hand with Alex. They went through an opening in the bushes to see a hill over looking Baltimore. It was beautiful, and Jack could not be happier he decided to come along on this journey. Jack walked up the hill and sat there, amazed by the beauty of the simplest things. Alex smiled watching him, pleased with himself that he made Jack happy. They sat there for over an hour watching the sunset. 

It was getting harder and harder to write these things as i was getting flashbacks. The words were coming to me so easily now. Although it was hard to bear the memories without remembering how much of an ass i was, oh wait.. AM. I am an ass. My mind just kept flowing agreeing with my wrist to keep writing. "It's such a shame that we play strangers, No act to change what we've become, Damn it's such a shame that we built a wreck out of me, Oh, calamity, Oh, calamity..." That line didn't need a flashback because its so true to whats going on right now. My phone buzzed, I didn't even bother to look at who was calling. I've given up. I picked up the cold brick of a phone, only to ask "Jack?" I asked hopefully "Uh, no. It's Rian. We were wondering why you weren't at school today, and also wondering why the fag isnt at school either." Rian explained, "What do you mean? Do you think im with him? because im not. Why would I ? " I asked. "Yeah, whatever. Bye." Rian hung up before i could get any answer from him. I looked at my screen on my phone, the light of it making my eyes squint to be able to see. I hovered over Jack's name before pressing call. The phone kept ringing, I knew he wasn't going to answer but i thought i would try. " Hey, you've reached Jack, sorry im not able to get to the phone, but if you leave a name and a message i can get back to you as soon as possible." Jacks voicemail went on. It was nice to hear his voice, because the last time i heard it, i was the cause of the pain ringing in it. I pressed done and threw my phone. Fuck. I just kept writing. "I'll remember nights alone, Waking up to dial tones, Always found my greatest moments, In the sound of your hello's, Now i struggle to recall the reasons you would come to leave, Oh calamity.."

I couldn't write anymore. Not tonight. I took a last gulp of the vodka before getting up and swaying side to side. I walked over to grab my phone and walk back over to my bed. I lingered for a moment stairing at my phone, Jack's number was still on the screen so i pressed it as it began to call. Please answer Jack... I heard someone answer at the end of the line. "Hello?" The stranger asked, except, it wasn't Jack.

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