"In this life of sin, most people are just looking to get rich, fuck, and brag. Me? I was just looking to survive. Get up each day and live what complicated of a life my deadbeat father and crackheaded mother gave to me. Sin poisoned me at a young a...
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~~~~~~~~ I had no idea...but it all made sense now. ~
"Yeah. You read that shit right, I ain't her pops. So my question to you is, who is?" He asked, clenching his fist as he came up to me.
I failed to look at him after that but still saw him making his way up closer and closer to me. I was so shocked by the news myself. I couldn't believe he wasn't Aanyah's dad....and after all this time like he said. Sad thing is.....
I already knew who her real father was. Why didn't I see the signs sooner.
"Answer me" he demanded, towering over me as I still looked down from the guilt.
"Marcus I–"
*Slap*💢 "You what?! Who is it, Rowan!" He yelled after slapping me across the face.
Tears started pouring down once he hit me and gripped my shirt out of anger. Aanyah saw the whole thing from the back of me and still cried out. "Marcus I'm sorry–" I cried, holding on to my stinging face.
"I knew she wasn't mine! I knew all along that you were lying to me! You know who her father is! And I do to! You hoe-ass bitch!" He yelled, moving my arms to hit me yet again.
"Stop it! Stop hitting mommy!" Aanyah screamed at him and rushed up to me.
"You still wanna talk back to me!" He yelled, pulling Aanyah away to threaten her with his hand in the air.
I stopped him from doing anything and sheltered over my child quickly. "If you lay a finger on her, I will kill you! You can hit me all you want but if you harm my child, I'll fuck you up!" I yelled with tears in my eyes.
He backed up and stepped on the papers. "Get the fuck out my house and you better get in touch with ya new baby daddy. You better hope he don't ditch ya hoe-ass again for another bitch too"
*
I stayed at my mom's house that night and for a couple days. Marcus didn't want us in the house anymore after the argument. I felt horrible for letting Aanyah see me in such a vulnerable state once he hit me. I just...locked up in the moment and all of the trauma from my childhood came haunting me again. I felt weak all over again and all I could think about is what Roy told me back when I was dating Ta'joe.
~ "Rowan, he left you broke and stranded out there. But hey, I don't care about what you do. Don't come asking me for help when shit hits the fan..." He said coldly.
"Even if something did happen, I know you wouldn't let him kill me....."
"Yeah, keep thinking that..." ~
It seems like everytime I move on, it's always with some asshole who ends up putting their hands on me. I burnt the bridge with Roy years ago once I decided to have a baby without him and it ended up breaking us up entirely once our last argument broke out. I blame myself for everything....and everything I did to that man. He didn't deserve any of it....and now he's happy with someone else and expecting another baby on his own down there.
