I'm afraid of the way I feel,
So numb to emotion that I cannot reel,
From reality and the facts I face,
To soften the blow from the pain I ache,
But maybe that's the true meaning of apathy,
An excess of feeling to the point of saturation,
And soon, nothing can fill the void,
That hovers over my head when I think,
Because it's already full with all the feelings I ignore,
I should feel something more,
But the feeling of feelings desensitizes me to them,
So all I'm feeling is the feeling of feeling,
And this feeling leaves me confused and lonely in this world of noise,
And I wish I knew what would heal me,
And mend my heart and brain,
And make me sane,
But I don't know,
And the hurting that shows,
Will never go away,
As long as I stay,
But my mind is not a hotel room to rent,
And my heart never lacks vacancy,
They're not possessions I can abandon,
Or little trinkets to be left forgotten,
No,
I cannot go,
I have to be strong,
I have to move on.
