Cap and Gown

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Today was the big day, a bitter sweet moment in my life—I was graduating high school. With just half an hour before we took the floor, I gave myself a final once-over in the mirror before exiting the girl's bathroom to a small crowd of familiar faces: mom, grandpa and grandma, Margo, Bryan, even Loden. While it lifted my spirits some that theirs would be among the thousands of pairs of eyes that would witness me march across that stage, it still saddened me that one set would be missing among the spectators.

My mom pulled me aside. "Honey, what's wrong? You look so sad."

"He should be here today," I said to her quietly.

"I know, I know," she replied, pulling me into an embrace. And maybe I just needed this because for once, I didn't pull back. I didn't reject the moment. I relished it and embraced my mother back.

"Uh, excuse me, don't mean to break up this hugfest...well, yeah, sort of," Bryan interrupted, "but can I get in on some of this action?" Bryan...always the comic relief.

Before I had a chance to respond, Margo approached. "Seriously, Bryan? she scolded. "Can't you see they are having a moment?"

"I know, but..."

"But nothing! How about we give them some space, dude?" she said, dragging him away, as he mouthed the word Sorry. I simply mouthed back: It's okay.

When I returned my attention to my mother, she had a strange look on her face. "Not sure what that was about," she said.

"Yeah, I know, my friends of sorta crazy like that."

"Well, I'm glad you have them."

"Me, too."

"You know how so very proud I am of you, don't you?"

"I think so."

"I am, Chloe, and so would have been your father. I know you miss him, and you're not sure how to feel about today, but he would want you to be happy about this accomplishment. You understand?"

"I guess so."

"Today is your day, okay? I want you to walk out there and be proud of what you have achieved. Can you do that?"

I nodded.

"Good. I love you, Chloe, and we are going to get through this."

"I love you, too, mom."

After one final embrace, my mother and I rejoined the others. It was then that I was able to acknowledge Loden by giving him a quick glance and smile. He returned the gesture.

"Ok, then. Let's go see my little girl graduate, shall we?"

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